My Oath to the STTF

[ZeroPointMachine]

I shall not berate the fish.

Driving off the fish is the most -EV thing I could do to myself and my STTF brethren. The tank is sacred and the glass should never be tapped. If I find that I cannot keep my hands off the keyboard I will allow myself to occasionally type "nh".

I shall never coach the fish.

I do not need to prove that I know how to play. My brethren deserve to play against uneducated fish. I consider the terms "moron", "idiot", "fish", and "stupid donk" badges of honor.

Should I violate this oath I will expect to be exposed as the pathetic loser that I am and should expect to be banned from the company of my brethren for all eternity.

To this I swear so help me durron and citanul,
ZeroPointMachine

If you read this post you have two choices. You can swear to this oath and live by it, or you can expect the most unholy "IT" the variance Gods have ever unleashed to haunt your pathetic soul forever.