Female+sexy+skeptic = 1 in a million? // Men are better than women?

[guesswest]

I'm finding this whole thread a little scary. Picking a partner by measuring her (or him) against qualities x, y and z seems like a very detached and sorta sociopathic means of mate selection. We don't choose who we fall in love with, or at least I don't think people with a decent sense of emotional connectedness and empathy do.

It probably does involve the attributes a person has in relation to your own, but if so it's an unfathomably complex process we couldn't begin to deconstruct, and probably in some way related to the way in which each other's damaged parts fit together as much as it is the objectively positive ones. Setting aside the problems RE the rareness of the person the OP describes - I'm guessing if he found her she'd run a mile upon realising he was pursuing her based on some kind of dehumanising formula.

[valenzuela]

I agree with guesswest, I dont choose the girl Im atracted to.


Schopenhauer wrote an essay about attraction his case is that one tries to find the qualities he doesnt have on her partner while being more tolerant to the qualities one does have, for instance Im a smart serious kid.

The girls Im going to feel atractive( according to this theory Im not claiming its true) to are sweet outgoing sociable girls, they dont really have to be that smart.

The logic behind this is that I basically want the girl so I can have kids with her.
Arent my kids better off if they have the genes of their serious intelligent father and the genes of their lovely sweet mother? Intsead of having the genes of two smart serious persons?

[Sephus]

[ QUOTE ]
The logic behind this is that I basically want the girl so I can have kids with her.
Arent my kids better off if they have the genes of their serious intelligent father and the genes of their lovely sweet mother? Intsead of having the genes of two smart serious persons?

[/ QUOTE ]

what if they end up being ugly like their father and dumb like thier mother? [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

if i had a son i'd want him to be as smart as possible, a daughter i'd want to be as good-looking as possible.

[valenzuela]

Im not ugly, Im a handsome young men. Im just not very outgoing.
The point is that my kid wont be a smart as me and they wont be as outgoing and sweet as their mother.
However he/she is going to be smarter than her mother and more outgoing, less shy than me.
Its not that I dont like smart girls, I do, but I focus on the stuff Im missing first( all of this according to Schopenhauer theory btw)
Ok so she is a stupid bitch, I let it slide.
She is intoverted, thats a dealbreaker.
see?

I may expand on Schopenhauer views about women...
anyway the love essay by schopenhauer has about 45 pages, the one about gals has like 13 pages.

[Speedlimits]

[ QUOTE ]
Im not ugly, Im a handsome young men. Im just not very outgoing.
The point is that my kid wont be a smart as me and they wont be as outgoing and sweet as their mother.
However he/she is going to be smarter than her mother and more outgoing, less shy than me.
Its not that I dont like smart girls, I do, but I focus on the stuff Im missing first( all of this according to Schopenhauer theory btw)
Ok so she is a stupid bitch, I let it slide.
She is intoverted, thats a dealbreaker.
see?

I may expand on Schopenhauer views about women...
anyway the love essay by schopenhauer has about 45 pages, the one about gals has like 13 pages.

[/ QUOTE ]

Totally disagree with that. For me, intellect is a huge turn on/off when it comes to finding a girlfriend. Attractiveness is also on the top of the list. Being sweet/caring gets a footnote.

[madnak]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm finding this whole thread a little scary. Picking a partner by measuring her (or him) against qualities x, y and z seems like a very detached and sorta sociopathic means of mate selection. We don't choose who we fall in love with, or at least I don't think people with a decent sense of emotional connectedness and empathy do.

It probably does involve the attributes a person has in relation to your own, but if so it's an unfathomably complex process we couldn't begin to deconstruct, and probably in some way related to the way in which each other's damaged parts fit together as much as it is the objectively positive ones. Setting aside the problems RE the rareness of the person the OP describes - I'm guessing if he found her she'd run a mile upon realising he was pursuing her based on some kind of dehumanising formula.

[/ QUOTE ]

On the contrary. There are strong, solid correlates. Most people aren't aware of them - that isn't an indication that most people are somehow more "in touch" than intelligent people. In fact, the common patterns of attraction indicate extreme superficiality, as well as self-delusion (particularly about the superficiality part).

To acknowledge that yes, brains matter or that yes, looks matter - that's being emotionally honest. Note that in my post I said that qualitative attributes are most important - but to suggest that quantitative attributes are wholly irrelevant is absurd.