Heard a good joke today

[Dorothy Mantooth]

Thought I'd share...

It's 11AM and this guy starts drinking at the local bar. He's there all day just pounding drinks. Drink after drink after drink and like that it's 10PM and this guy just pukes all over himself right at the bar.

"Aw, man my wife is going to kill me." the drunk says.

Another guy at the bar says "Here's what you do. You go to the ATM and take out $20. Tell her some drunk A-hole puked on you and offered to pay to have your shirt cleaned. Trust me it works all the time."

"Wow, what a great idea, thanks man." Says the drunk and he heads home.

He tells his wife the story, which she believes and hands her the money.

"Here you go, you take care of it"

She replies "Wait a minute, why is there $40 here, you said he gave you $20?"

"Yeah I did, but the guy [censored] in my pants too.