Emotional Affairs

[Blarg]

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That might be why things can seem complex and threatening to you that aren't really -- because you are flying by the seat of your pants and haven't really made peace with yourself as to who you really are and what you believe.

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Good post (all of it, I just snipped for brevity). I'm not in flux or confused. I'm pretty sure of who I am, what I feel, and how I want to deal with it. I'm at peace with my nature. I also recognize dangers inherent in my nature, or perhaps more correctly, limitations I have due to it.

Just like I've come to terms with some physical limitations (sports injuries have taken their toll), I've come to terms with emotional/mental ones as well. I might regret I have them sometimes (man, I wish I could still compete in sports...), but oh well.

Sorry if I gave the impression of a guy in conflict [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]. Just an interesting topic, largely because so many people have a belief of what's right or acceptable, but rarely examine that belief.

"No, he can't go to a movie with his female friend!". Why? If you said "He can't skydive without a parachute!", well, duh, there's a pretty clear reason why not. But in the case of the movie the reason is often buried in emotion, insecurity, culture, and often these source are even conflicting.

I just find it an interesting exercise to ponder. And, actually, frequently makes me rethink my own position on things because I realize I've reacted at a gut level, not a rational level, on some issues.

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Yeah, I've been kind of getting the idea in your posts that you are willing to look around at the issues from different sides, maybe even play devil's advocate, so my reply was more general than specific really, taking "you" more as the series of ideas you put forth than necessarily a close representation of who you are.

I actually do respect people who are careful about their limitations. I just think we shouldn't either try to impose them on others and proscribe their behavior, or be so afraid of our own limitations that we cut ourselves slack for the rest of our lives on trying to move beyond them -- however slowly and painfully. Limitations are natural, but I think we often sell ourselves very short, just because it's so much easier and less scary, and what we claim as our limitations often aren't even close to them. I think most of the best things I've ever done, and most of the best ones I can still conceive of doing, involve struggling against my limitations, not snuggling up close with them contentedly while waiting for that long dark oblivion.