Things that say "I'm a piece of trash"

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There's no right way to wear crocs.

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Are these crocs? They look like something preteen girls would wear. Men aren't actually wearing these, are they?

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People are starting to wear them over here. I make fun of them. They retort with the fact that they're comfortable. Yeah? Well my bathrobe is comfortable. Can I wear that around when I do the shopping?