BBV help a brother out?

[baronzeus]

BEAT: i cant play on any sites anymore except for nitty US ones
BRAG: im a LHE king and have $$$
VARIANCE: my friend told me there is a way to play on certain euro sites (Crypto, PokerRoom) in the US by doing things in certain ways

If you have ANY ideas on how I can get on any non-US sites I will use my LHE king money to pay you a nice cash reward $$$$!!!!! and if you get me onto PARTY POKER i will get you a SUPER REWARD!