So I was with this girl...... [x] thread delivers w/ pic

[Ogre691]

So awhile ago I was dating this chick... we had been together about a year, and we were bangin and [censored] like all the time but there was one problem. She wouldn't let me stick it in her ass. We'd talk about it but she'd be like there is no way that is getting up there yadda yadda. Pic of girl for reference:



She's the one in the middle obv.

Anyway, this one night we were at her mothers house (home for the summer from uni she was staying with her mom) and she had just got out of the shower cause we had just finished playing racquetball. (I showered at the gym she didn't like to for some reason)

So she comes back to her room all clean and looking mighty fine so we get to making out and [censored] and I start finger bangin her y'know and she is loving it and is right horny so I already got her naked and I'm just in my boxers and I start going down and her and [censored]. Anyways I got her going pretty good and for some reason this crazy idea pops in to my head.

I'm thinking, [censored] she's never gonna be any cleaner than right now, so I'm like, baby, do you think I could lick your ass? (trying to warm her up for anal play LDO) and she's like I dunno, why would you want to. And I was like c'mon baby maybe you'll like it, plus your all cleaned up now right? And she's like well I guess so, if you really want to.

So anyway, this isn't really something I was planning on doing, but this girl had such a tight little ass I just wanted it so bad.

Anyways, she gets down on all fours doggystyle like, and then lick her pussy a couple more times and then I go in for the kill.


But just as my tongue just barely touches her anus, it happens.








She farts.




Right on my tongue.

And then she giggles.

And then I.... taste it.

I am so disgusted I ran out of her room and right across the hall to the bathroom, in my boxers, right in front of her mother who happened to be coming up the hall, and then I proceed to throw up for a solid ten minutes, like disgusting dry heaving puke. I here her mother asking her if I am alright, I then proceed to walk back in to her room, her and her mother are both there, I don't say a word, put on my pants and shirt and leave.

The thing that bothered me the most about this was that she giggled, so I thought she might have been holding it in and released it at the most opportune time for her own sick enjoyment.

I got other it after a week though, kept seeing/screwing her, until she cheated on me a year later.

Cliffnotes / tl;dr:

Brag: Bangin hot chick for over 2 years, while I am less than attractive myself.
Beat: Taste of ass on my tongue:
Variance: Mother never brought incident up again.