Some tool makes a retarded bluff against me live

[TheRick]

So my hot ass girlfriend and I just got into Vegas for some BS convention for her work. She's so fking hot that I dont wanna let her roam her slutty ass around Vegas by herself so I make her come and watch me play poker. Here's her pic, try not to beat it too hard losers:



We go to the Rio together and even though I'm [censored] rich I decided to slum it up at 5-10 nl for a while. I pull out my roll that's bigger than my girlfriend's hips and buy in for $1000.

Some dorky looking kid who probably spends all his time reading lame philosophy books and dropping names like Sartre and Derrida and Foucault is eye-fking me from across the table. wtf man, just cause you can't get a girl like mine doesn't mean you gotta stare at me.

First hand I post and I get pocket sevens. RAISE THAT UP BIATCH. The creepy dude from the BB reraises me and I put him on AK ldo. The flop comes 444 and I tell him, "hey loser nerd you better watch out, I've got a full house and no one ever folds that [censored]." He bets and I call. The turn is a ten and loser nerd checks behind, he must be scared of me.

River is the worst fking card in the deck, a king! [censored] man I know he has AK so I check. He bets and after some thought I decided to just fold. The fking idiot shows off and flips over his 72o. nice play man, just b/c you can't get a girl like mine doesn't mean you gotta try to make me look bad.

later on I decide to change into a striped shirt and go to the club with my btch. If I see that little punk I'm gonna shove my foot up his ass and throw and orange at his head.

THE RICK FOR LIFE