Dude stalking my girlfriend

[inlemur]

Title sums up the tldr.

So my girlfriend was dating this dude a couple years ago, he starts out as a normal dude but apparently spirals into depression, is put on antidepressants, but coupled with his alcoholism this only makes things worse. Things end with him becoming abusive, threatening her. Finally she leaves him when he actually hits her.

Dude can't let go, shows up at her apartment or wherever else she happens to be, she tells him she wants nothing to do with him, he starts getting aggressive. Calls her threatening to kill her, follows her around and parks her in wherever she goes, etc. She gets a restraining order. Calls continue to happen, he also gets his friends to call and threaten her, and his mother who is also psycho. The police step in and tell him that they're dead serious and if she presses charges he's going to serve time. She doesn't hear from him for a bit, then wakes up one day and he's in her bedroom (doors were locked). He is drunk but not aggressive, police come, she doesn't press charges (just wants him to leave her alone at this point). That's the end of the story for a bit.

A full year later I meet her and we start dating. Both of us graduate college and move to a different state, though we are not living together. Two weeks ago she's at a gas station, and some dude pulls in near her, starts yelling at her, catcall stuff like "Hey sweet thing etc". She ignores him thinking it's just some bozo until he starts yelling "Hey what's wrong you little (c-word), you gonna call the police again? You gonna call the police again, bitch?" He speeds off, she doesn't get a good look at him, but he is bald (as is the ex) and is driving a red car (as did the ex).

She tells me all this and I tell her that hopefully it's just some random lunatic and she doesn't have anything to worry about, her ex is 1000 miles away and is still in college, he'd have to be even more insane than either of us thought he was to follow her. That night, apparently the same guy drives up and down the street by her apartment (!) yelling the same [censored]. She calls me and asks if she can stay at my place, and comes over.

At this point obviously we're both 90% sure it's the ex, but no proof or anything. She stays over at my place for the next few nights, nothing happens. Yesterday, she gets a phone call:
"Hello?"
"Is this Amy?"
"Who is this?"
"We met at a club last night, you gave me chlamydia you bitch!" hangs up

Which is apparently the sort of thing he and his friends started to do after the restraining order. So she calls Verizon to try and get the phone call traced, they say they need a police officer to call. She calls the police, they send three officers (!?) over to her apartment and ask her about the incidents, they try to call Verizon but the call center had closed by this time.

Today she calls the police again, who say she should just call Verizon and tell them to give her the number, they refuse, say they need the police, there's a huge mess with her calling about 10 people back and forth because nobody knows what to do, and finally she gets the police to call Verizon, and now they insist that she must have a subpoena, which involves a judge and lots of paperwork and such that just isn't going to be a priority to the police.

Also, we've been trying to get the gas station to show us their surveillance video from the night of the incident there so that we can get a better look at the car and maybe the plates, but they're demanding a subpoena as well.

So that's the story to date. I'm looking for advice on the following:
Tracing phone calls. Surely you have a right to know who is call to harass you on your private phone without getting a subpoena.
General advice on dealing with maniacs. If I was in my home state I'd get a crew of guys together and rough him up, but I'm not. But for what it's worth, neither is he.
Ideas on how to get the cops to acually help her. Right now their attitude is pretty much "well he hasn't assaulted you has he?". However he has a criminal record (not just the stuff involving her, also some breaking and entering and other assault charges), is threatening her, and has the restraining order out on him (issued in another state, not sure how that works). It's rediculous that she should have to wait for him to attack her.

I appreciate any advice you guys can offer, thanks for reading this whole thing if you got this far.