Why do I hate failure? And how do I learn to accept it?

[poker-penguin]

OK. I'll try and keep this somewhat short.

I hate failure. This is way beyond a healthy dislike.

This affects all aspects of my life, so it's a character trait rather than a poker knowledge issue. In many ways, because it so obviously depends on chance, I can disassociate my short term results in poker from my efforts (a little bit at least, red numbers still sting).

Even when I KNOW that trying and failing is a necessary and likely outcome, I still can't stand it.

Also, even when failure is not necessarily my fault (for example poker, sports, etc), I still blame myself.

Obviously this is not healthy. I mean yes, this hatred / fear has motivated me to various achievements, but it has also crippled me in other ways (mostly with women and not following through on business ideas I have had, but other things too).

I've known this for a long time but it's really starting to piss me off, maybe I don't have the courage to accept failure, I don't know.

Not really sure what I am looking for out of this thread. Anyone had simillar experiences (especially if you know any exercises / tips to help me get over this).