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Rachel Ray has my wife under a spell
Rachel Ray is evil. That's all I can figure.
My wife watches "30 Minute Meals" every day, even though she can't prepare any meal that doesn't end in "___-Helper" (Hamburger Helper, Tuna Helper, etc). She buys every magazine that has Rachel Ray on the cover. Now there's a talk show, as well. I'm sitting on the computer, and she's watching YouKnowWho on the tv. Suddenly, the tv goes mute. I turn around to see if wifey is still in the room. She is. I'm confused. I look at the tv, where there's a close-up of a syringe going into an old lady's nose. "AAAARRRRRGGGHHHH! WTF are you watching???" "Rachel Ray. That's why I muted it, I knew you didn't want to see/hear what they were doing." "And you still watch it??? She's got you under her spell, I swear to Christ!" Wifey really gets upset when I crack jokes about the size of Rachel Ray's mouth. "What are you watching, The Muppets?", or, "Looks like 'Jaws' coming at us!" |
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