wow [censored] u too god

ahnuld · #1 07-14-2007, 08:53 PM

Played a 1600 hand session tonight. Was gonna try to play 6k hands but got too tilty and had to quit. Only lost 4k this session (lost 8k this morning in plo) because people are terrible at poker.

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

Button ($1467)
Hero ($950)
BB ($2467.75)
UTG ($1216)
MP ($1829)
CO ($1495)

Preflop: Hero is SB with A[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img].
1 fold, MP raises to $40, 2 folds, Hero raises to $150, 1 fold, MP calls $110.

Flop: ($310) 6[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 6[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], 4[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players)
Hero bets $200, MP raises to $871, Hero calls $600 (All-In).

Turn: ($1981) 5[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($1981) J[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $1981

Results in white below: 
Hero has Ad Ac (two pair, aces and sixes).
MP has 4d 6d (full house, sixes full of fours).
Outcome: MP wins $1981. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

BB ($1807.25)
UTG ($3228.50)
Hero ($1735)
CO ($1165.14)
Button ($2198)
SB ($1075)

Preflop: Hero is MP with A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], Q[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img].
1 fold, Hero raises to $35, 2 folds, SB raises to $121, 1 fold, Hero calls $86.

Flop: ($252) 8[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], 2[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players)
SB bets $162, Hero calls $1614 (All-In), SB calls $792 (All-In).

Turn: ($2820) K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($2820) 9[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $2820

Results in white below: 
SB has Ah Ad (one pair, aces).
Hero has As Qs (high card, ace).
Outcome: SB wins $2160. Hero wins $660. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

CO ($873.75)
Hero ($1466.03)
SB ($1336.75)
BB ($970)
UTG ($992)
MP ($1223.50)

Preflop: Hero is Button with Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img].
UTG raises to $40, MP calls $40, 1 fold, Hero raises to $180, 2 folds, UTG calls $952 (All-In), MP folds, Hero calls $812.

Flop: ($2039) 5[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], 7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], 5[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

Turn: ($2039) J[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($2039) 9[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $2039

Results in white below: 
UTG has 8d 8c (two pair, eights and fives).
Hero has Qc Ac (one pair, fives).
Outcome: UTG wins $2039. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

Button ($1106)
SB ($864.51)
BB ($1679.25)
Hero ($1581.25)
MP ($807.25)
CO ($1551.96)

Preflop: Hero is UTG with A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 2[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img].
Hero raises to $35, 3 folds, SB raises to $100, 1 fold, Hero calls $65.

Flop: ($210) J[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 3[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players)
SB bets $140, Hero calls $1481.25 (All-In), SB calls $624.51 (All-In).

Turn: ($2455.76) 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($2455.76) 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $2455.76

Results in white below: 
SB has Ks Kh (one pair, kings).
Hero has As 2s (high card, ace).
Outcome: SB wins $1739.02. Hero wins $716.74. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $6 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

Hero ($591)
MP ($1125.18)
CO ($872.44)
Button ($820.45)
SB ($912.30)
BB ($759)

Preflop: Hero is UTG with K[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img].
Hero raises to $22, 3 folds, SB raises to $70, 1 fold, Hero calls $48.

Flop: ($146) 8[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 5[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], Q[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players)
SB bets $100, Hero calls $521 (All-In), SB calls $421.

Turn: ($1188) A[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($1188) 9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $1188

Results in white below: 
SB has As Ks (flush, ace high).
Hero has Kd Kh (one pair, kings).
Outcome: SB wins $1188. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

Hero ($1103)
CO ($771)
Button ($985)
SB ($829.24)
BB ($1290)
UTG ($1242)

Preflop: Hero is MP with T[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img].
UTG raises to $36, Hero calls $36, 1 fold, Button calls $36, 2 folds.

Flop: ($123) J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (3 players)
UTG checks, Hero bets $90, Button calls $90, UTG folds.

Turn: ($303) A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 players)
Hero checks, Button bets $200, Hero calls $200.

River: ($703) 5[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 players)
Hero calls $777 (All-In), Button calls $659 (All-In).

Final Pot: $2139

Results in white below: 
Hero has Tc Qc (flush, ace high).
Button has Ah Jh (full house, aces full of jacks).
Outcome: Button wins $2021. Hero wins $118. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (4 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

Hero ($1058)
UTG ($636.75)
Button ($973)
SB ($891)

Preflop: Hero is BB with J[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]. UTG posts a blind of $15.
UTG (poster) raises to $20, 2 folds, Hero raises to $80, UTG calls $60.

Flop: ($170) T[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 5[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 7[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 players)
Hero bets $125, UTG raises to $250, Hero calls $853 (All-In), UTG calls $316.75 (All-In).

Turn: ($1714.75) A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($1714.75) Q[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $1714.75

Results in white below: 
Hero has Jd Jh (one pair, jacks).
UTG has Tc Ad (two pair, aces and tens).
Outcome: UTG wins $1303.50. Hero wins $411.25. 

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (4 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

SB ($1351)
BB ($985)
UTG ($1892)
Hero ($2274.50)

Preflop: Hero is Button with 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 5[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img].
UTG raises to $36, Hero raises to $120, 2 folds, UTG calls $84.

Flop: ($255) J[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 players)
UTG checks, Hero bets $160, UTG raises to $600, Hero calls $1994.50 (All-In), UTG calls $1172 (All-In).

Turn: ($4181.50) 5[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($4181.50) A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $4181.50

Results in white below: 
UTG has 7h 7c (full house, sevens full of aces).
Hero has 3s 5s (two pair, aces and fives).
Outcome: UTG wins $3799. Hero wins $382.50. 

Had to quit after the last one as I knew I was tilting.

edit: forgot this gem

***** Hand History for Game 6152115132 *****
$1,000 USD NL Texas Hold'em - Saturday, July 14, 19:41:05 ET 2007
Table Table 127043 (No DP) (Real Money)
Seat 4 is the button
Total number of players : 6
Seat 1: TheSoundOfMusic ( $1,000 USD )
Seat 5: Finsbury ( $1,689.31 USD )
Seat 2: Day_Trader_7 ( $1,576 USD )
Seat 4: S_Newfarmer ( $1,312.75 USD )
Seat 6: Abraxas_ ( $1,092 USD )
Seat 3: ccopcutt ( $169 USD )
Abraxas_ posts small blind [$5 USD].
TheSoundOfMusic posts big blind [$10 USD].
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to TheSoundOfMusic [ Ah As ]
Day_Trader_7 folds.
>You have options at Table 126318 (No DP) Table!.
>You have options at Table 125403 (No DP) Table!.
>You have options at Table 126476 (No DP) Table!.
>You have options at Table 127368 (No DP) Table!.
ccopcutt calls [$10 USD]
S_Newfarmer raises [$50 USD]
Abraxas_ folds.
TheSoundOfMusic raises [$170 USD]
ccopcutt folds.
S_Newfarmer is all-In.
TheSoundOfMusic is all-In.
** Dealing Flop ** [ Jc, 2s, 9c ]
** Dealing Turn ** [ 2c ]
** Dealing River ** [ 8c ]
TheSoundOfMusic shows [ Ah, As ]two pairs, Aces and Twos.
S_Newfarmer shows [ 7s, 7c ]a flush, Jack high.
S_Newfarmer wins $312.75 USD from side pot #1 with a flush, Jack high.
S_Newfarmer wins $2,013 USD from the main pot with a flush, Jack high.

1.6.0.5. · #2 07-14-2007, 08:57 PM

you suck

Dan BRIGHT · #3 07-14-2007, 09:01 PM

poker 101:

step 1) flop the nuts
step 2) hold

0evg0 · #4 07-14-2007, 09:03 PM

1. Play suited cards
2. Flop flush draw
3. Bet and raise enough to get all-in
4. Make your flush
5. ???
6. Profit

Go back and review Step 4.

ahnuld · #5 07-14-2007, 09:05 PM

[ QUOTE ]
1. Play suited cards
2. Flop flush draw
3. Bet and raise enough to get all-in
4. Make your flush
5. ???
6. Profit

Go back and review Step 4.

[/ QUOTE ]

[censored], if only somebody could tell me this befooooooore.

Windforce · #6 07-14-2007, 09:06 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Party Poker

[/ QUOTE ]

...

Nielsio · #7 07-14-2007, 09:06 PM

Stop calling reraises with suited stuff.

Last hand = l o l

ahnuld · #8 07-14-2007, 09:07 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Stop calling reraises with suited stuff.

Last hand = l o l

[/ QUOTE ]

history obv. Now I must issue the obligatory HU 4 rollz challenge

chuckbomb · #9 07-14-2007, 10:05 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $10 BB (6 handed) Hand History converter Courtesy of PokerZion.com

Button ($1106)
SB ($864.51)
BB ($1679.25)
Hero ($1581.25)
MP ($807.25)
CO ($1551.96)

Preflop: Hero is UTG with A, 2.
Hero raises to $35, 3 folds, SB raises to $100, 1 fold, Hero calls $65.

Flop: ($210) J, 3, 7 (2 players)
SB bets $140, Hero calls $1481.25 (All-In), SB calls $624.51 (All-In).

Turn: ($2455.76) 8 (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($2455.76) 4 (2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $2455.76

Results in white below:
SB has Ks Kh (one pair, kings).
Hero has As 2s (high card, ace).
Outcome: SB wins $1739.02. Hero wins $716.74.

[/ QUOTE ]

I mean, I know you're good and all, but what the hell is this?

citanul · #10 07-14-2007, 10:18 PM

you got straight up pwnd in a lot of these hands.