Jukebox Warfare

[RicoTubbs]

I like music and I like drinking, so not surprisingly I like jukeboxes in bars. I always get a little excited when I go to a bar for the first time and I see a jukebox there. Anyway, I often throw some money in because my taste in music in better than most random bar-goers. In the last year or so, I’ve noticed something that annoys the piss out of me: Jukebox Priority Play.

What I grew up with: You put money in a jukebox and pick some songs. Those songs are added to the end of the queue and are played in the order picked. Your group of songs comes after the groups that have been picked before you. When you hear the first song you picked you get super-excited because you know you’re going to rock out for the next 10-30 minutes, depending on how many songs you picked. [Unless you unknowingly picked a song already in the queue in which case: a) you get excited for nothing – PSYCH and b) you look like an idiot because you repeated a song.]

Current situation in a lot of bars: You put money in a jukebox, pick a song, and a screen pops up that says “FOR AN EXTRA QUARTER/TOKEN/DOLLAR YOU CAN PLAY THIS SONG NEXT”. This is completely ridiculous. Here are the problems with this:

a. It’s violates my sense of fairness. I don’t like the idea of some punk jumping the line by paying an extra token.

b. If you picked a good series of songs, one [censored] PRIORITY PLAYER can dump a turd right in the middle of an awesome list. Example: I line up the following:

Avril Lavigne – Sk8r Boi
Motley Crue – Home Sweet Home
Whitesnake – Here I Go Again
The Killers – Mr. Brightside
Def Leppard - Photograph
[Or some such mix. This one doesn’t feel exactly right because I’m doing it on the fly.]
And everyone in the bar is slowly getting ramped up. By the time, Mr. Brightside finishes up, people are in a frenzy. You know it’s going to be a bloodbath when the guitar intro from Photograph starts up and all of a sudden everyone just stops because some PRIORITY PLAYER jackass has decided that he needed to hear Gonna Make You Sweat by C+C Music Factory RIGHT NOW. It disrupts the entire atmosphere and ruins your night.

c. I don’t even understand how conflicts between PRIORITY PLAYERS are handled, but I’m sure it’s not satisfactory. Example: I am PRIORITY PLAYER1 and have paid the extra money to hear my song immediately following the current song. PRIORITY PLAYER2 goes right after me and also pays an extra token to hear his song immediately. One of us will be very unhappy even though we are both PRIORITY PLAYERS. It’s like some bad mix of game theory, nuclear arms race, and [censored] music.

So basically I hate this trend and I can’t do anything about it. I generally choose not to play music right away because a) I’m a cheap bastard and b) I assume everyone after me is going to do it too, so it becomes pointless, so it tends to result in me leaving the bar before I get my full musical purchase.

BTW, the inventors of this are f’ing genius. I hope they burn in hell, but it is a fantastic jukebox feature for the owner.

More info:
Jukebox with priority play feature
United States Patent 5999499
http://www.freepatentsonline.com/599...50517420711383

[guids]

hahaha...awesome. Ive already posted my disgust for these jukeboxes before, they suck hard, we tested it out because we get free credits, and the order goes 1st guy to hit play next -> 2nd guy to hit play next -> the guy who "should" be up next.


with the bad though, comes the good, as most of these machines lets you play a little "wack the mole" after your song selections and earn yourself free credits, or do what I did, get a universal keychain remote, have a buddy let you program the remote that comes withe the juke box, and get free creds anywhere you go!


Im known for my selections, monday night it was:


phil collins- in the air tonight
tony bennet- swinging on a star
peter gabriel- sledge hammer
curtis mayfield- superfly
SOME [censored] EMO BAND THAT SOME DOUCHE BAG RUINED MY VIBE WITH
ram jam- black betty

[El Diablo]

Rico,

I have seen three variations on the algorithm (I am sure there are more):

1) (SUPER RETARDED) The latest picked priority songs always jump to front of queue. WTF!?

2) Priority songs go behind all other priority songs, but in front of all normal songs (rendering basic song purchase pretty much useless, basically just increasing jukebox cost)

3) Added levels of priority exist, the more you pay, the higher you go (only seen this once).

I completely agree with you that jukebox runs should not be interrupted. Complete BS.

I'm also pretty impressed with:

Avril Lavigne – Sk8r Boi
Motley Crue – Home Sweet Home
Whitesnake – Here I Go Again
The Killers – Mr. Brightside
Def Leppard - Photograph

Personally, I would replace Home Sweet Home with Sweet Home Alabama. And maybe replace Here I Go Again with some Journey. And then add a G'n'R song.

[guids]

how do you know you are from st. louis, your hand goes up in the air whenever bon jovi plays on teh jukebox.



feel free steal that one, just make sure you replace your locale and song.

[El Diablo]

quids,

"phil collins- in the air tonight
tony bennet- swinging on a star
peter gabriel- sledge hammer
curtis mayfield- superfly
SOME [censored] EMO BAND THAT SOME DOUCHE BAG RUINED MY VIBE WITH
ram jam- black betty"

Wow, that is diverse. I guess that's one pro for digital jukeboxes.

Solid, though I would switch out sledgehammer with something else.

Here's a mellow one I did a while back at a low key dive bar:

Three Dog Night - Mama Told Me Not to Come
The Band - The Weight
Three Dog Night - Joy to the World
Stealer's Wheel - Stuck In the Middle With You

[El Diablo]

quids,

IMO you can never go wrong w/ Jovi, Journey, or GnR when it comes to jukeboxing.

[guids]

also,

van morrison- moondance, I think I threw that in the mix, along with snoop and dre. Im a 12 songer usually.

[RicoTubbs]

[ QUOTE ]
do what I did, get a universal keychain remote, have a buddy let you program the remote that comes withe the juke box, and get free creds anywhere you go!

[/ QUOTE ]

Sweet

[ QUOTE ]

Im known for my selections, monday night it was:


phil collins- in the air tonight
tony bennet- swinging on a star
peter gabriel- sledge hammer
curtis mayfield- superfly
SOME [censored] EMO BAND THAT SOME DOUCHE BAG RUINED MY VIBE WITH
ram jam- black betty

[/ QUOTE ]

Interesting list - In the air tonight is a great way to start off. It sounds a little too diverse for my taste, but I recognize that you need some variety. It's a tough balance.

I think your list is really vulnerable to a jackass priority player.

[invisibleleadsoup]

i don't have much to add,i just wanted to join everyone else in expressing both my disgust for such a scaldy manouver on the part of the jukebox manufacturer and a sneaking admiration for how they managed to find a way to get everyone to pay more for the same service.

i remember reading a book called football against the enemy a few years ago about football (soccer) in its various forms around the world.

anyway,the guy visited some former soviet country where the games were so corrupt that both sides would end up having to bribe the ref just to get a fair game - this new jukebox dynamnic always reminds me of that.

one good point about these new fangled jukeboxes,however,is the fact that a lot of them seem to be able to download songs not on the main list,although this usually costs you two credits - the jukebox industry must be raking it in!

[RicoTubbs]

[ QUOTE ]
quids,

IMO you can never go wrong w/ Jovi, Journey, or GnR when it comes to jukeboxing.

[/ QUOTE ]

Diablo,
"Don't Stop Believing" used to be a staple, but I really don't know how the Sopranos finale has affected it. I just don't feel comfortable with it right now. I don't think I have the tolerance to hear some idiot say, "ZOMG, YOU JUST PLAYED THAT BECAUSE YOU SAW IT ON THE SOPRANOS." If I was drunk, I'd probably start going ballistic and tell him how I almost picked "Only the Young" because I get really psyched up thinking about Louden Swain cutting weight so he could take down Shute. I'm sure that wouldn't go well.

Anyway, Bon Jovi obviously rules. (quids, I've never heard the St. Louis connection, but I'm sure the joke is hilarious.)

My Bon Jovi picks depend on the crowd. If it's a bunch of idiots who don't know anything but what played on the radio, I'll go with "Livin' on a Prayer". If it's a more sophisticated crowd, I'll go with "She Don't Know Me". If it's a hardcore group from New Jersey, I'll break out "On the Edge of a Broken Heart" because it's always a good idea to reference the Disorderlies movie, starring The Fat Boys. Oh, and if it's a weird high-school-reunion-type atmosphere, I'd probably go with "Never Say Goodbye", but I've never actually been in a situation where it seemed appropriate.