Please Demod Mike Haven Now...

[PITTM]

Okay, so this story starts about a year ago. I made a post in the zoo about how ridiculous everyone was being about piling on dutch boyd when he obviously wasnt going to pay them back. For pages and pages, grannymae trolls me, puts up my personal information and calls me names.

Mike haven sends me pm's accusing me of trolling grannymae when the complete opposite is true. I guess it makes sense from someone who has their head so far up granny's ass they cant see whats going on.

Anyways, since that day, here are the completely unsolicited pm's Mike Haven has sent me:

Hi.

Would you have any objection to my changing your Title to "Forum Virus"?

Thanks.

M.


no, i wasn't joking - i think "Forum Virus" would be an excellent Title for you in the context of your persona in an internet forum

however, i am "professional", and I wouldn't change it without your permission

i was hoping you would see the third level of it and allow it

if you don't, no problem - i won't change it without your permission


okay, so all of our moderators are 4 year olds...got it...

ONE DAY LATER:


Hi,

You seem like an intelligent guy who knows his way around this forum and computers in general.

Could you write an ABC simple but comprehensive Search Instructions for Dummies for this site?

I can never find anything I want to search for, and I don't understand how to find all old posts by people; or how to search for phrases; and a few other things.

As far as I am aware, no one else has done one, so, if you could, I would link to it in the Zoo FAQ post.

Thanks.

M.


wait, what? i mean, sure i guess i will help the forum because i like it, i just dont get this request. So i write the FAQ, mike repeatedly thanks me for doing a great job. then, one day later, something strange happens.


Post in mods' forum:

"Mike, you do know that RJ's post is a joke... "

Now I'm confused.

what i wrote was a mod's entire post replying to the post i made inviting other mods to link to your post if they wanted to

i didn't think your post was a joke, but then i am dumb as you and others have told me over the past few days - so i assume i am not seeing something that you, he and everyone else is

i've told him that you must have got me good and that i'll be deleting your thread and the faq post link

the only thing that i can think of is that you and he and everyone else know all about the "" and + and - thingies and i am the only one in the world whoi doesn't

thanks a bunch, mate

ok i won't delete it

however, i don't appreciate your having made a fool of me simply because i am computer-inept


not that i can see, but then i haven't tested your "" and + and - instructions

why would one of the high profile mods say it was a joke, then another one make a related comment?

it's no big deal - if you've made a fool of me, it's no worse than some of the other things you said about me a day or two ago

i honestly dont have the slightest idea what he is babbling about. if he took the time/had the intelligence to read the document he would probably realize how crazy he sounds.

for what its worth, this is the FAQ post i made where i was "totally making fun of mike"(??????????)

so i decide theres no point in continuing if mike is just going to spout things that make no sense whatsoever.

We cease conversation and since i think his moderation is the most biased, logicless [censored] in history, i avoid the zoo, which was once my home forum.

Until today...

In the post below this one "why is katyseagull purple" the op asks the question in the title, which seems completely innocuous. The first response is TT being a complete, off the wall jackass as usual and for once i point out that he is being such...

Minutes later, mike pm's me to tell me he edited my post. I ask him why it is okay for moderators to berate the users they are supposed to be serving but if the events occur the other way around, what is said must be censored. After which he sends me the following pms:


if you honestly think his five (?) word quip was in any way equivalent to your several lines of gross insults then i wasted my time defending you from being banned for it

well since what i said was one sentence and less than 15 words, i would venture to guess that his only point here is that he can exaggerate well.

After this i tell him i have a hard time trusting his judgement after the whole search FAQ debacle. His response:


You, sir, are a liar.

I wouldn't be surprised to learn that you are mentally ill, too, so there is no point communicating with you about things where you have come to believe your hallucinatory memories.

You lie(d) about everything to do with it.

You were trolling in the Zoo, so, as my strategy to deflect your usual obnoxiousness, (although I didn't know what sort of person you were at that time, so I use the word "usual" in the sense that I have since learned about your style of posting), which I use often, in the hope that trolls appreciate receiving a kind word and thinking that they do have some worth, I asked you to write a helper.

The strategy worked quite well in your case, as you left the Zoo alone and presumably moved on to troll in other forums.

Your warped imagination has since made you think that I wrote PMs to you that were anything but relevant to your trolling, and I have always ignored commenting on your misguided accusations, as I realise that it is the troll's lifeblood to try to gain attention to its worthless and troublemaking existence by making up ludicrous lies.

Why not show me copies of your and my correspondence? Oh, right. Because it doesn't show what you lie it does.

THIS IS MY PM I SENT IN RESPONSE

what are you even accusing me of lying about? I said that you were ridiculous after I did you a favor. If you are disputing this I can send you every pm where you act ridiculous. Either you are just completely insane/forgetful or youre now trolling me...

"The strategy worked quite well in your case, as you left the Zoo alone and presumably moved on to troll in other forums. "

This interaction I was talking about happened 7/06. In the last TWO YEARS i have made a total of 27 posts in the zoo. If you think that i was constantly trolling the zoo at that point than you are the one with the mental problem. Seriously, go ahead and search for yourself. Have a blast with the next pm you send me where you make up stories and call me names...

"Your warped imagination has since made you think that I wrote PMs to you that were anything but relevant to your trolling,"

like i said. the pms are right here in my inbox. I am reading them right now. would you like me to send them along? Or will you then say that someone hacked your account and send them to me or something?





Nice trolling. Keep writing and then when I respond, call me a troll.

If you can't quite work it out, I'll write it clearly: I don't want to correspond with you. Don't write to me and I won't respond to you.

As I said, it was a successful tactic. Since I asked you to write the helper, thankfully, you have hardly posted at all in the Zoo. At least nothing worth trying to remember. Please, please, keep it that way. (Although, no doubt, you'll now think it's clever to start trolling there again.)

Don't forget to read the copies of the PMs that I was responding to in the series about which you are lying. Although from the content of this series, it's clear that you choose to pretend (?) to misunderstand what anyone else is stating as part of your trolling technique.

Now i know, 2 things i must cover:
a) TL;DR, yeah, i know, i expect most people will agree. hopefully a few wont.
b) I would NEVER EVER post someone else's pms to me under normal circumstances. But at this point it is just belligerent abuse of the posters he is supposed to be helping. The admins wont do ANYTHING about it. what else am i to do?

In closing, I think mike should be demodded and feel kind of lucky he isnt banned for this behavior.