Another Vegas Report

[Swt J]

Here is my pre-vegas report. Will post my post-report in a moment.

Midnight Thursday -- Worked late today to take care of business at work. Got home around 9:00 and watched a chick-flick with my wife ("the O in Ohio"). It gets a solid "Meh" rating from sweet J. Although Parker Posey somehow is inexplicably attractive in it. Must be the lighting. Heather Graham has a bit part and is just smokin' hot.

2:00 a.m. -- can't sleep. Still too pumped. Up about my Vegas trip (my first in a couple od years). I still can't decide whether I am a gambling addict or not (it is a very close call). I gave up internet poker about a year and a half ago, which probably saved my marriage and my job. This trip, in part, is a test for myself to see if I can actually do a Casino trip, or I need to cut that cold turkey, as well (I don't do well with moderation regarding anything, frankly). I am hoping to keep it together, because I really love Vegas.

4:00 a.m. Friday morning -- still can't sleep. This doesn't bode well. My kid brother and I just watched 4 or 5 episodes of The Real World.

5:30 a.m. -- got an hour's sleep. Showered, shaved, and out the door. Random moment: my brother, who is black, has moved in with me while he takes a year off from school. He is giving me a ride to the airport, and we are talking about nearby colleges. I mention that he may wnt to consider Howard. He tells me "I don't really like black people.". Oh boy. I make a note to myself to revisit this when I get back.

9:00 a.m.-- layover in Cleveland. Have to find a john where I can drop the kids at the pool. The bathrooms in the Cleveland airport are filthy. Just one step above a truck stop. What the hell? D-minus minus rating here.


10:00 a.m. Friday west coast time -- on the plane getting ready to land in Vegas. Are planes getting smaller? Christ, I'm getting fat.

Sitting next to a middle-aged couple from Cleaveland were are absolutely hammered and reek of alcohol. He's got a huge handlebar mustache, and she talks with the raspy voice you get from 30 years of smoking. They are on their way to Hawiaii and decided to stay up all night drinkng on the theory that they'd sleep on the plane. But they don't appear to be slowing down yet. I counted four vodka and tomato juice drinks each in the first hour or so, and then the stewardess cut them off. They want me to order for them, but I'm drinkng myself, and the stewardess gets wise. They start talking loudly about joining the mile high club. Ick. He passes out, and she is starting to to touch my leg when she talks to me. My spidey sense is tingling.

Still too excited to sleep.

On the positive side, I've been drinking steadily enough that the couple next to me's joke are getting funnier, and I don't mind the occassional knee touch.

Also debating whether to share these updates with muy wife. I decide that the answer lies in the Fosters in front of me.

11:00 a.m. Friday Vegas time. Getting ready to de-board. Some thoughts about the bankroll:

I went back and forth with Wife a LOT about the amount of money I'd bring/spend on this trip. She HATES gambling, and even less happy that I like it so much. But she has really been a champ regarding this trip. I told her that, aside from the money I brought, I would limit myself to a max of $400 per day out of the bank machine (1200 for the three days). In addition to that, I have about 500 or so in my pocket, for a total bakroll of 1500 or so for gambling, and a couple hundred for entertainment, dinners, etc.

We had a sizable argument before I left regarding taking the credit card, which she did NOT want me to bring, for a variety of reasons, many of them valid. I ultimately decided to bring it in case of emergency, but will NOT use it unless absolutely necessary. I don't want to harm the goodwill she has shown me.

At the moment, my plan is to play mostky NL poker at the MGM (both 1/2 and graduating to 2/5 if I am running well). My buddies prefer blackjack, so I will mix it up with BJ and occassional craps. But in my experience, it is much easier to just tread water playing low limit poker without worrying about winning or losing my shirt. The point is to have FUN, not to try and win money.

By the way, the 45 year-old woman beside me now appears to look more like 35 years old, and her smoker's breath appears to be inexplicably gone. Maybe I just wasn't paying attention earlier, but she looks like she might be kinda cute.

NOTE TO SELF: STOP DRINKING IMMEDIATELY.

[Swt J]

Post-Vegas report -- I was originally planning on keeping running notes. This didn't happen because it just didn't seem like very much fun.

So that leaves me with just general recollections to report. Not as much fun, I know.

(1) I will never fly Continental again. I am too angry to even talk about it rationally at this point, but needless to say, they suck. Badly.


Some highlights (this is completely off the top of my head):

(2) I hit the MGM poker room, the Bellagio poker room, and the Wynn poker room. I played mostly at the MGM poker room, which reminded me most of DC.

-- If I were to compare them to cities, I'd say the Bellagio was like New York -- too big for me, too many people, too much pretention, too overwhelming of the senses. Like NYC, there is just too much for a person to do; I can't relax in any one place, because just around the corner I could be having fun doing something else. Sensory overload.

-- The Wynn was like Chicago: really nice, almost glitzy, with fancy tables and attentive staff. But again, there was no real "homey" feeling. This was a BigCity among poker rooms. Too many strangers, to many unfamiliar faces, even after coming back a couple of times. Amost too glitzy. And just a little impersonal (but not as much as the Bellagio).

-- The MGM, to me, was perfect. Reminded me of D.C. - although it is theoretically a city, still very much feels like a town. There are only so many places in DC where you can go, there are only a handful of bars that are much fun, and maybe 2 or 3 neighborhoods that you want to hit for going out (Adams Morgan, Georgetown, Rossolyn). Similarly, the MGM was big enough to have all different spreads, but small enough so there were only a few tables of each. For example, I played 2-5 NL almost exclusively, and there were at most 3 tables open for 2-5 at any given time. Of those three tables, I recognized half the people as regulars. The other half were tourists that absolutely were pounced on.

(3) It was fun to see the camaraderie of the locals playing poker. They all knew eachother and seemed to have genuine fun with eachother, even as they went after eachother's stacks.

(4) On the 2+2 forums, the 2-5 tables are described as "juicy" and "loose" and "easy," or some crap like that. That is complete horse-poop. These tables were quite tough. At any given time, the table consisted of 3 or 4 locals (I include folks from LA here) who were very good, and 2 or 3 folks from out of town who were very good, and maybe 1-3 folks where were their just to have a good time who were a little too drunk or a little too crazy. THOSE were the folks to make the money from. The trick was to not bleed your chips while you wait for the hands against the dipshhts.

(5) All in all, I made money from the poker tables, probably about $1000 over the weekend. But I came home with less money that I brought because I bled cash elsewhere, including an EASY 3-4 hundred on massages at the tables. Sweet Jesus, those are awsome!! I told one of the bosses they should get rid of the prostitutes and just hire massuses. He mentioned that people want sex, and I said, "shht, I'm married, I can have sex with my wife whenever I want (well, not really), but I CAN'T get messages like this from my wife." I also dropped about 3-4 hundred on food and entertainment, and I paid cash for the hotel room. I also jumped on craps or blackjack for fun, and bled some money there, too.

[Swt J]

One particularly fun instance:

On Sunday morning, I head to the tables at about 7 a.m., because I had read on the 2+2 forums that that is the best time for drunkards. So I sit down at a 2-5 table and get exactly the opposite! It was basically 6 other guys who I mostly recognized, and who were also looking for fish. I'd say that they were all pretty much better than me, so I was slowly bleeding chips, and in roughly safety mode. All of a sudden we hear a loud CRASH from across the room. I looked over and saw this unbelievably drunk kid sitting down at the 1-2 NL table. He had apparently fallen out of his chair, and was not getting up, saying "shhhorry, shory, I didn't mean that." We could hear him talking about how he was the King of Vegas, and how he was gonna make himself some chump change off the chumps at his table. He also made some offensive comments towards a couple of the girls at his table.

Anyway, I call the floor guy over, and tell him I wanted to try my luck at the 1-2 NL table. The floor guy says, "sir, I think I know exactly where to put you," and bumped a 60 year-old lady so that I could sit to the left of the left of the drunk kid. As I was leaving, the guys at the 2-5 table were trying to talk me into staying, saying that the action on the 1-2 tables generally suck (they just wanted more of my money). I told them "have you been listening to that SOB over there? If you don't come sit with me, you don't like money."

Anyway, on the very first hand after sitting down, I get A 8, and the flop comes AA9. The kid goes all in for $200 (the max buy-in at the 1-2 tables). I called, he turned over a 9 3, and I doubled him up. He said, "How did you know I was bluffing." I told him, "because you are trashed, and I can see into your soul." That pissed him off, so he went all in the very next hand. I had something like 4 9, so I folded. He called everyone psssies, and the dealer warned him. I was seriously worried that he'd get kicked out. The very next hand after that, I was dealt A Q suited. I told him, in a very respectful mannerr, that I didn't think he had any testicles, or at the very least, maybe he was born with some, but they've since dried up like two little honeybees." I'm not even sure what that means, but it made him angry and he went all in again. I called took another two hundred from him. I could see the floor guy chuckling to himself as he then came over and told the kid it was time to go. The kid's buddies collected him, and they stumbled off somewhere.

[KurtSF]

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I also jumped on craps or blackjack for fun, and bled some money there, too.


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Some? I think the devil's in the details here. How much is some?

[Swt J]

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I also jumped on craps or blackjack for fun, and bled some money there, too.


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Some? I think the devil's in the details here. How much is some?

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Probably $500 over the course of the weekend. Too much.

[KurtSF]

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I was dealt A Q suited. I told him, in a very respectful mannerr, that I didn't think he had any testicles, or at the very least, maybe he was born with some, but they've since dried up like two little honeybees."

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This, however, is totally bad azz!

[CBass1724]

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Anyway, on the very first hand after sitting down, I get A 8, and the flop comes AA9. The kid goes all in for $200 (the max buy-in at the 1-2 tables). I called, he turned over a 9 3, and I doubled him up.

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I assume you mean you stacked him or he doubled you up.

Cool and entertaining report.

[Swt J]

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Anyway, on the very first hand after sitting down, I get A 8, and the flop comes AA9. The kid goes all in for $200 (the max buy-in at the 1-2 tables). I called, he turned over a 9 3, and I doubled him up.

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I assume you mean you stacked him or he doubled you up.

Cool and entertaining report.

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Right, took his stack. Still don't have the termanology down.

[droopy0021]

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Random moment: my brother, who is black, has moved in with me while he takes a year off from school. He is giving me a ride to the airport, and we are talking about nearby colleges. I mention that he may wnt to consider Howard. He tells me "I don't really like black people.".

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I'm trying to figure this one out. He's black but you're not? Very possible through adoption, 2nd marriages etc.

[BenJammin']

awesome report...gotta love those drunkards