What to do with Heirlooms when the Family Blows Up

QTip · #1 10-13-2006, 04:36 PM

So, this is a cool place for me to get this stuff off my chest because no one knows me.

My father has always had a pretty good collection of different rifles and pistols that were his grandfathers and were handed down to him.

Anyway, the group made up of my parents and siblings just blew to pieces not too long ago. I moved to another state because I don't even want to be around them. Part of this is the discovery that my father is a pedaphile, and that just is indescribable to me. At any rate, he and his forefathers (who I've now learned were pedaphiles) have always been into guns. Some of my fondest memories with my father were reloading bullets, hunting and so forth. However, I'm not into it that much. I like shooting here and there, but nothing like they were. My father has handed the guns to me one by one for different occassions like birthdays, Christmas and so forth. He's always expressed to me that his desire is that they are never sold and are passed onto my children.

Now, I'm in a position where I could use some money and these things are pretty valuable. Inside of me, there's still quite a bit of anger towards him that makes me want to say "[censored] you" and sell them. I really don't feel like having anything he had. However, I'm hesitant to do so because of the fact that in 5 or 10 years, I may have a different mindset on this whole situation.

Just interested in some other's thoughts.

deadbody · #2 10-13-2006, 04:41 PM

Herilooms are just that, the memories you have with your dad (were positive experiences at the time) are things you can someday build with your kids.

The negative actions that your dad did (I'm assuming he didn't molest you or my arguement is moot) are unrelated to the happy times you shared together, and the happy times you can share with your kids, before passing these heirlooms down to them.

man · #3 10-13-2006, 04:42 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I'm hesitant to do so because of the fact that in 5 or 10 years, I may have a different mindset on this whole situation.

[/ QUOTE ]
that'd be enough for me to hold onto them. if it pisses you off every time you think about them maybe it'd give you closure to sell them but otherwise unless money's tight I'd keep them.

IggyWH · #4 10-13-2006, 04:45 PM

I'd sell them if you need the money and can help you out. Of course, I'm not a big family guy and don't put much stock in material possessions so it wouldn't be a big deal for me to sell the stuff off.

guids · #5 10-13-2006, 04:47 PM

If the money is tight, and you feel guilty about selling them, donate a percentage to an anti-pedophile charity.

QTip · #6 10-13-2006, 04:48 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I'd sell them if you need the money and can help you out. Of course, I'm not a big family guy and don't put much stock in material possessions so it wouldn't be a big deal for me to sell the stuff off.

[/ QUOTE ]

You know, I'm not a big one for possession type stuff either. I've gotten rid of just about everything. When my parents split up, they wanted to know if I wanted this or that. I didn't want anything...I don't like a lot of stuff in general.

I've had some of these guns for a while. I used them more when we lived in the country. But, now we live in the city, and they just take up space.

I do know that if I sold them and he found it, it would hurt him A LOT. I'm not really looking to do that either...not that type of person.

*** · #7 10-13-2006, 04:49 PM

Are you that broke? If so, sell them. Those dinks in the "How little can you live on" thread that say they could live in the woods with a bow and arrow (or rifle in your case) and get by just fine are either expert outdoorsmen or idiots. Given the ratio of the two in our society I'll leave the judgement up to you.

If you have enough money to get by, you should hang onto those guns. You like shooting every now and then, and it sounds like fond memories of your dad are going to be harder and harder to come by. Might as well hang onto something that will make the ones you have seem a little more concrete.

Oh yeah, you probably won't catch pedophilia from the guns so I wouldn't worry about:
[ QUOTE ]
I really don't feel like having anything he had.

[/ QUOTE ]

beenben · #8 10-13-2006, 04:54 PM

don't make a decision you might regret and your kids and grandkids might regret. You can always sell them later, or give them the choice. If you've got a roof over your head and food on the table, heat in the winter, etc., don't sell.

*** · #9 10-13-2006, 04:56 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[I do know that if I sold them and he found it, it would hurt him A LOT. I'm not really looking to do that either...not that type of person.

[/ QUOTE ]
You could just give them back to him. Explain that you don't ever use them, rifles aren't practical for the kind of shooting you do in the city, and that maybe one day you'll want them but not right now.

soma_ · #10 10-13-2006, 05:00 PM

Hope you're doing well, QTip.