Kegger Trip Report

[good2cu]

I'm traveling for a month to play the EPTs with TheUsher and Apathy, and here is a trip report from Apathy's party to send us off which I wrote for ourwebsite. I thought it was pretty funny.

Day 2 9/8 –

The first few hours of the day we lounged around the house playing video games waiting for our hangovers to pass. Around 2 we decided that it was probably time to actually apply ourselves and do something productive so we went to “The Beer Store” to pick up six kegs for the party. In Ontario the government has a monopoly on alcohol by law and you can only purchase it at government run stores. Due to the monopoly the alcohol prices are much more expensive and the six kegs ended up costing us around $1500. We then went to the liquor store, since The Alan Sass is to big of a balla to drink beer. We picked up a 3000ml giant jug of crown royal, along with a few fifths of grey goose. No matter where we are in the world, there is always a gleam in our eyes when we enter a liquor store. Dan, who is 29 was actually disgusted by our alcohol shopping habits in Las Vegas. Imagine being a broke college student and coming into hundreds of thousands of dollars. What are you going to buy? Alcohol obviously.

We then went home and moved some furniture around, which included moving a desk to the front lawn where it will obviously stay for the rest of the year. I say obviously because Peter’s house is populated by savage Canadians . A tree in their backyard has had a deck chair in it for two years, truly modern art. After that we just lounged around, since work wasn’t

Anyways, at around 9pm we tapped the keg and the chaos began. We started off playing some beer pong with Apathy and I started off dominating with two victories. Beer pong has only recently become popular in Canada and I was trash talking their skills, buy in the end I was really just carried by Jetten. At this point it was 10pm and I was already feeling a little bit tipsy. People started to arrive around this time and introductions were made. The whole sorority of Alpha Gamma something had heard that the Ship It Holla Ballas were in town and decided to ditch the Greek scene to come party with them. Seeing that the house was now full of girls I decided that it was time to lose in beer pong and begin to socialize, or at least that is my excuse.

Anyways the night was pretty blurry but I’ll give you some highlights. I was down $2000 to Alan playing high card and flipping coins buy skillfully won it back on a double or nothing $2000 coin flip. During, our last beer pong gave some sorotity sisters stood behind Jetten and I and felt up my rock-solid ass. Jetten told them that Las Vegas strippers had rated it a 9.5, and I asked him if that really happened. He said no, and I was sad. James, one of Peter’s friend from Toronto who also stayed with us for a while in Vegas passed out rather early on the coach and I took a huge tub of butter and started spreading butter all over his face. He started to wake up so I stumbled away. Sam, one of peter’s female friends stuck her hand into the tub of butter and started to spread it all over his face. James again woke from his drunken stumble grabbed her and proceeded to smear butter all over her. It was funny.
Two girls Peter had been hooking up with were at that party and that made for some pretty interesting moments. One of them was a local sorotity girl who we will call L who was there with all her friend. At one point the sorotity girl locked Sam in a room and told her and I quote, “I have put 5 months of work into Peter Jetten and I’m not going to let you ruin it”. Sam claimed at this point that she was afraid for her life. Other quotes I heard from the girl, “I want to win.”. “Peter Jetten will come to his senses and choose me”. I was quite drunk and I think I suggested to both of the girls that I though they should just have a threesome. Meanwhile, Peter coped with the drama by drinking another 50 beers.

My favorite part of the night was when I was buttass naked laying on my blowup bed in the basement getting a [censored] from one of the sorotity sisters. L, the sister who was mad at Peter, broke into the locked bedroom, despite me yelling “[censored] off” and saw her sister sucking me off. This upset her. She screamed, “If I don’t get to hook up with Peter, I except my sisters not to hook up with her friends.” I quickly put my cloths on and went upstairs and went to drink more beer. Unforantly for the girls I think Peter got too drunk to sleep with either one of the girls [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]. The house batted .500 thanks to the sorotity sisters.

Tonight, It’s off to Toronto where hopefully I don’t get peer pressured into getting drunk once again.

[RunDownHouse]

Don't you have a blog or something where this can go?

[GooseHinson]

Where in Ontario was this party held?

[dp13368]

http://www.shipitholla.com/

[Awesemo]

this is the most arrogant post i've seen in a while. i as well hope you dont get pressured into drinking again!

[good2cu]

hmm really? I didn't think it was that aggorant although Ive never been accused of being humble.

[TheAntiPuritan]

[ QUOTE ]
hmm really? I didn't think it was that aggorant although Ive never been accused of being humble.

[/ QUOTE ]


don't sweat it. 90% of trip reports bring out haters. I thought is was above average. pics are always a way to earn some bonus though...for future reference.