LICK AN ASS

[im a model]

[censored] piece of [censored] haista muna bastard cockass. my friend (brag: i has friends) bet me 2k at even money that i couldnt hit a shortstack cycle in 10 attempts. [ss cycle: start with 100 at 1-2, get to 250, play 2-5, get to 500, play 5-10, get to 1k, play 10-20 to 2k.] last two tries i made money (you keep excess profit at each level) but busted at 5-10 (to some BULL [censored]). anyway, at 1-2 at flamingo (softest game on strip/in world):

table is fairly loose:

hero is BB. entire table folds to button, button limps, hero looks at small blinds cards while he looks at them and sees 8[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] clear as day. (tip: looking at your opponents cards gives you a tremendous advantage in no limit hold em.) small blind raises to $22 lol wtf. hero looks at K[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]J[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] and goes all in for $115. button folds. small blind SNAP CALLS and turns over 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] wtf? race time:

A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img](suweeet)7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

what a [censored] stupid piece of [censored] calls off like 60bbs preflop with 88. and dont even critique my play because it was perfect: i had massive fold equity even against someone fairly retarded, i also get to show KJo to the rest of the table whether he calls or not after i go all in so i will look like a moron, worse case scenario is flip, plus the whole table folded so deck is more loaded towards Ks and Js and not 8s (utg said he folded an 8) piece of [censored] [censored]. and calling is bad because he may have A8 or 89 or 83 and then i wouldnt know where i was on the flop and then button may call I DID EVERYTHING PERFECT. I AM THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA. makes me so mad.

brag: drinking grape gatorade. [censored] is hella grapey yo.

[Flintoff]

Would you play aces or kings that way?

[Mrage]

lol owned.

[PwnedDonk]

get dealt Jh next time

[FlyingStart]

your friend seems smart

[The B]

flat call the $22 pre, play aggr post-flop when A9J hits, you've seen the 8c, so best he can have is 88, A8, 98, J8 (every hand in this range would go in the muck given the texture of this board)

[LionelHutz00]

lol why would you take this bet at even money?

[im a model]

[ QUOTE ]
flat call the $22 pre, play aggr post-flop when A9J hits, you've seen the 8c, so best he can have is 88, A8, 98, J8 (every hand in this range would go in the muck given the texture of this board)

[/ QUOTE ]

lololololol so you think a guy raising to 22 pf with A8 is going to check fold a A9J flop? what if the flop isnt A9J? what if its 439? what if the button calls and the flop is A9J and he fires like 35? plus if hes the kind of retard who raises to 22 pf with an 8, you can be sure hes cont-betting any flop and then if i move in hes getting like 3-1. going all in is so unequivocally the perfect move. i thrust my thumb up a pregnant black womans butthole as a testament to how perfectly i played the hand.

[GTBMuckface]

[ QUOTE ]
lol why would you take this bet at even money?

[/ QUOTE ]

hes stoopid

[im a model]

[ QUOTE ]
lol why would you take this bet at even money?

[/ QUOTE ]

AS I HAVE PREVIOUSLY STATED, I AM THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA. i had hit for the cycle in 3 of the previous ten or eleven times i had tried it prior to this bet. keep in mind this is live poker in las vegas so its like playing at a down syndrome convention.