An old-school Phish phan goes to see Trey solo: emo trip report

[Los Feliz Slim]

Cliff notes if they’re necessary in TLDR (didn’t know where else to put this): This is a long and boring and kind of emo story about an ex-hippy seeing a musician he hadn’t seen in a long time in a very different context. There is no conclusion.

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Between 1991 and 1996, when I was 18-23, I went to approximately 40 Phish concerts. It was a really big part of my life. The last show I went to was at the Fox Theater in Atlanta in 1996, not long before I moved to Los Angeles from St. Louis and started a new life.

My life has changed a lot since then, and Phish broke up. Their breakup has been somewhat bittersweet for me. While they will always be my favorite band of all time, Phish - and the crowd that watched/followed them - changed a lot in the five years that I went to their shows. The venues they played got a lot bigger, the crowd got younger and seemed to be more about the drugs than the music. Also, it seemed like Trey Anastasio, Phish’s front man, was withdrawing further and further into himself, separating himself from the band. While this was happening, I was growing up and very busy becoming a talent agent (working 70 hour weeks, etc). So I stopped going to concerts altogether, and then they broke up.

Last week I drove past the Wiltern Theater in Los Angeles and saw that Trey was playing on Sunday, December 10. I checked Ticketmaster, and good seats were still available. It’s a sign of my age that I immediately snapped up two reserved seats in the balcony - back in the day it would’ve been general admission so I could show up four hours early and be right next to the stage. My back is bad now, so there’s no way I could stand the entire time.

Another big change is that I’m currently sober. I’ve had a rough time existentially lately, rough enough that I sought medical attention and am taking medication for it. I hate going to the doctor and I hate admitting weakness, so taking this step is a sign that I was encountering some pretty serious problems dealing with the world. My body’s been adjusting to the medication and I’ve been less “stable” than I’ve ever been, so drinking or smoking pot would just be insanity at this point. So, not only would I be seeing Trey for the first time post-Phish, not only would I be going to my first concert since 1996 (save for the LA Phil and some small clubs), I would be doing it without the aid of drugs. So I took my wife.

I wasn’t sure what to expect from the crowd. I didn’t think that Trey would have many purely non-Phish fans, people who had never been into Phish but liked Trey. I was right about that: everyone was there to see Trey because of Phish. Most of the people were in my age ballpark (I’m 33 now), some a little older, some a little younger. A few outliers on either end. There were other people that had clearly moved past the smoke-pot-until-you-can’t-see stage of their lives, but A LOT that had not. I wondered how many of the wasted, slightly pudgy and balding thirty-somethings I had seen Phish shows with. We’re a lot older now and it sure doesn’t look the same.

Trey and his band are very, very tight musically. Trey on guitar and singing, a bass player, keyboardist, drummer, and full horn section with some female vocal backup. It was SO weird to see Trey come out with a group of random people. He’s clearly the boss of this show, telling the other musicians when their turn to solo would be (other phans will know how different that is from a Phish show), and wandering into ten minute guitar journeys constantly. In fact, the horn section would go sit down when Trey got started on a long solo. The guy is a virtuoso, but it got really old. I enjoyed the time that we were there, but once we were two songs and forty minutes into the second set, it was time to go home. We had a sitter and I have to be up very early in the morning. So we left.

During a time that I’m less sure of who I am and where I fit in than I’ve ever been, last night was a very interesting experience. I’m sure I would’ve enjoyed it more if I was younger, higher, drunker; but I really don’t want to be any of those things. I guess I was hoping it would be just like it used to be, but I’m so different I don’t think that’s possible. I'm somewhat envious the other 30-somethings that were hitting the pipe the second the lights went down, but I also can’t imagine that still being me. Maybe I should just figure out a way to get the stick out of my ass. Or maybe it’s just different strokes for different folks. All I know is that I feel old.

[2Fast]

I never got into Phish, but a lot of my friends did and in their heyday it was a great band. I remember hearing they had trampolines on stage which they jumped on sometimes while they played bit in their concerts and probally were hacky sackin' as well. I would guess that it was especially good to follow them when they were still more doing the college circuit and gaining popularity - I remember seeing Dave Matthews way back when at the Bayou in DC (in like 1991) when they were just doing college gigs and it was great.

It's definitely weird getting away from the college/alternative music scene and hitting your 30s and then seeing bands break up and (worse) just missing out on what the new music scene is like - mostly bc you're just too busy doing other things in life that take priority. And it really hits home when you go to a concert and the crowd is as you said and it's really just not the same. And I hear you on feeling old - I guess you really just can't go back even if you want to so you kinda gotta treat each life experience for what it is and not try to make it something more. But I would say it's a lot better that you went and can see what it's like now versus then which probably gives you more a perspective on life in general.

[mrkilla]

LFS -

I am a huge Phish Head , (well more a Dead Head now) but anyway I've seen Phish numerous times as well and talk to alot of old school heades (people who tape, backstage personal and other assorted hippies higher up the phish food chain then the average headie) in all case we all agree


TREY SUCKS SOLO, stoned , drunk ,tripping or straight

the end

PS 91-96 were the golden Phish years, a lot of the headies who saw shows and followed the band then are jaded too.

[TheDudeAbides]

Excellent post. Your comments about the Phish crowd (especially towards the end of their run) are spot on. It became all about going to a festival with the sole purpose of getting [censored] up, often at the expense of actual Phans who enjoyed the music most of all. I can't count the number of times I actually had to ask people to keep it down during a show because their comments of "I'm sooooooooooooooo [censored] up. Dude - are you as [censored] up as I am?" started to interfere with my ability to actual hear the music being played. And the kids on Molly just chomping their off their lower lips started to really depress me.

When the Dead were finished in '95, I was excited at the fact that at least I could continue to see my second favourite band live. But it soon became apparent that walking through a Phish lot after the show was a VERY different experience than walking through a Dead lot. People were shadier, more confrontational, and overall just bigger douches. I had good times at Phish shows, but towards the end I got really soured on both the band (like you mentioned - Trey's attitude + his heroin addiction didn't help) and the fans.

P.S. I saw the Trey/Mike show here in the summer and it did nothing but depress me. Musically it was just...off.

[Snafu'd]

LFS,

I enjoyed the read. I had a similar reaction when I went to my first post Mikey Houser Widespread Panic show a couple of years ago. When I was big into the show scene I was in college and hung out with a group of friends that REALLY liked to party. I'd have to confess that the last shows I was going to my senior year had become less about the music and more about the partying. After graduation I dropped the bad habits fairly quickly due to jobs, responsiblities, etc. Some of my friends didn't leave the party scene and still haven't (I'm 28 btw) and I find it strange. Part of me wishes I could let loose like I used to but the other part of me realizes that I don't ever want to go back to the past. Anyway, nice read.

[Slow Play Ray]

[ QUOTE ]
I had a similar reaction when I went to my first post Mikey Houser Widespread Panic show a couple of years ago.

[/ QUOTE ]

[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] Mikey

[Los Feliz Slim]

Forgot that I took a picture with my camera phone. Notice that God has obliterated Trey from the shot:



Thanks for the thoughts, fellas. I'm still conflicted about all of this, but it definitely feels good to know that I'm not alone in these feelings. Things change, and it's sad, but that's life I guess. I wouldn't trade my wife and daughter to go back to 1992, but I still miss those days. Sunday night was just a reminder and came at particularly sensitive time for me.

Whatever you do, take care of your shoes.

[TheDudeAbides]

LFS - do you know if Chris Kuroda is doing his lights?

[Los Feliz Slim]

[ QUOTE ]
LFS - do you know if Chris Kuroda is doing his lights?

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't know. Does he like to blast really bright lights into the crowd's face at regular intervals? If so, yeah, that's probably him.

[renodoc]

Back in the day (my stepson likes to say this phrase quite a bit, like he even hadsa "day" to be back in yet")--

I saw Jerry at the Wiltern front row. I'm quite sure it was better than your Trey experience.... Great venue though.