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  #1  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:27 PM
Transidium Transidium is offline
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Default Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

This is an important lesson in the basics of poker for all rookie live/B&M players -- follow these steps to BIG $$$$11$

10. ALWAYS announce to the table, when first sitting down, that you won't tolerate your "bullets getting cracked", and that if it happens, you'll "coma them on the next hand".

9. ALWAYS call blind raises pre-flop, because the villain is trying to make a move, and you can't let him get away with it. Statistically, 3-9/off performs 24% better when it's played against a blind raise.

8. NEVER tip the dealer after a win -- they already make TONS from the rake.

7. NO LIMIT means that you are allowed to play any two cards, there is no limit on how good they have to be.

6. TWO PAIR of sunglasses will double your opponents' Difficulty Factor in reading your soul -- always come prepared.

5. A HOLE+BOARD combo on the turn of XX-XYY-Y is called a Full Mansion, and beats a Royal Flush, but ONLY if you announce it while dragging the pot away from the center before the dealer has a chance to deal the river.

4. MULTI-TABLING is not just for the Internet... all the live pros do it as well! Double the action = Double the profits!! Just make sure you let the first table know you are not folding your hand when you get up to go check your cards at the second table.

3. THERE is no shame in calling a large bet on the river with junk cards. This is called "Paying Someone Off", and is a sign of respect to more senior opponents.

2. JUST LIKE in Internet games, you can request a hand history from a casino/cardroom. As you're getting up to cash out, just ask the dealer to write it all down on some lined paper, before he deals the next hand. If you played more than 300 hands, thank the other players at the table for their patience while they wait.

1. QUEEN/JACK SUITED has more ways to win than ACE/ACE, so don't be afraid to push your stack in, even if your opponent shows them to you pre-flop.

Bon Chance!
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  #2  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:31 PM
SkeetyMcdoogle SkeetyMcdoogle is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

People will make fun of your post, so I'm just gonna tell you that you're a good person for trying.
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  #3  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:31 PM
ImsaKidd ImsaKidd is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

Weak IMO.
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  #4  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:37 PM
snakekilla88 snakekilla88 is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

Thanks for trying, but....

This post sucks.
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  #5  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:40 PM
Case Closed Case Closed is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

[ QUOTE ]
People will make fun of your post, so I'm just gonna tell you that you're a good person for trying.

[/ QUOTE ]

A kinder gentler BBV.
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  #6  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:42 PM
ESKiMO-SiCKNE5S ESKiMO-SiCKNE5S is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

i second skeety
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  #7  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:42 PM
Transidium Transidium is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

No, YOU suck! ... Check and MATE
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  #8  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:46 PM
Chomp Chomp is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

Very well formatted.
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  #9  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:46 PM
Kilillan Kilillan is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

B+ for effort. D for follow-through
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  #10  
Old 02-17-2007, 02:46 PM
Mat Mat is offline
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Default Re: Top 10 Rookie Mistakes: N00bs PLZ Read!

"Bonne chance !", idiot.
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