Women and their lack of identity..

[RayPowers]

This sounds like a woman hating topic, but it's not meant to be. I just don't get this.

There's a girl that I know which we'll say is an acquaintence since we don't hang out or talk very often, but we used to see each other on a regular basis (as friends). She recently got engaged, and the very concept has completely taken over her life.

Her MySpace page now is titled "The Future Mrs. (husband name)." Her fricking AIM Icon is a picture of her engagement ring on her finger. It's like, the instant she got engaged, she stopped being herself and is now "the other half of some guy." This doesn't seem unbelievably unusual either. My sister-in-law seems to have lost most of her individuality to her husband, catering to his schedule, doing what he wants to do, etc.

I can see women being in love with the idea and the event of a wedding, and losing themselves to the event, but these two examples, the people are losing their entire identity; their individuality which, to me, probably made them so attractive to their mate to begin with.

Is society still embedding the female side that they are valueless without a husband/kids or is something else going on here?

Ray

[adsman]

Did she have an identity to begin with?

[guids]

no some/most? women are just crazy when it comes to this regard. A friend of mine just got engaged and had the balls to say something along the lines of, you better get us a big gift, and everyone laughed it off as "oh, shes getting married..haha...etc". I probably wont be going to the wedding now.

[RayPowers]

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Did she have an identity to begin with?

[/ QUOTE ]

Both examples had very distinct identities outside/prior to this. The first girl was very much "one of the boys" before she was "taken."

Ray

[Dids]

I think that

"Is society still embedding the female side that they are valueless without a husband/kids"

Is pretty close to on point.

A lot of women are socialized to define themselves through family/relationships.

[Aloysius]

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A lot of women are socialized to define themselves through family/relationships.

[/ QUOTE ]

hence...

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women are just crazy when it comes to this regard.

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-Al

[fish2plus2]

"Did she have an identity to begin with?"

like <1% of hot western chicks have an identity imho.

[hamsamich]

I think this is very standard. My wife reacted much the same way when we got engaged and this was almost ten years ago so I guess things like that don't change much. The fact of the matter is that our society trains women from a very young age to think that their life does not really begin until they marry and have children. It's the male equivalent of a career. As much as our society likes to claim that women that have been given equal rights and that things have changed, women are still looked down upon by their friends and family if they don't find a husband sometime before age 30.

[adsman]

I know a few women who have done the same as this and they all had one thing in common. They didn't have an opinion on music. If I asked them what they wanted to listen to they responded that anything was fine. They didn't buy music and they didn't have a favourite group or artist. It was just a grey area to them.

Needless to say I avoid these types of chicks like the plague.

[katyseagull]

[ QUOTE ]
"Did she have an identity to begin with?"

like <1% of hot western chicks have an identity imho.

[/ QUOTE ]


We pretty much don't know what we're doing.