Baby Mama Drama

[WhatToDo?]

OOT I could use any advice you might be able to provide, cliff notes at the bottom.

I used to date this girl, and while often she made me as happy as I have ever been we would frequently argue and bicker. It was the type of relationship with the really high highs and really low lows. She had some problems relating to brain trauma at a very early age, and while this might have caused many of the problems, I honestly think I just wasn't ready for the relationship I found myself in. Eventually, we decided to break up and remain friends, occasionally with benefits (because the sex was phenomenal).

Anyway time passes and I start dating another girl. Things are going better this time around. No emotional rollercoaster rides. Well I'm in this relationship for about 7 months, when one night I hang out with my old gf. Things happen, and we end up sleeping together. We discuss this afterwards, agree that it is not that big of a deal, and go back to just being friends.

Well a couple of nights ago, my roommate who is friends with both of us, tells me that my ex-girlfriend is pregnant. At the time, I don't put two and two together, and we just discuss her ability to deal with a child (due to brain trauma mentioned above) and other things along that line.

Fast forward to last night when I'm laying on my couch, and realize "Holy [censored] that could be my baby". Well the ex and my roommate come over. We hang out for a while, and then the ex leaves to go tell her brother about the situation. (Keep in mind, that at this point, the ex doesn't know I know).

After she leaves, me and my roommate who knew about our previous hook-up discuss the possibility. She said she had talked about it with my ex, and that she at the time thought she was pregnant, but took a test and later had a period. I knew none of this. She also said that the ex is certain that her current bf is the father.

While this is very true, I'm a little worried because the more I think about it and the more checking I do, the timeline means it could have been me.

So at this point, do I just back the [censored] up and let the ex and her bf deal with this, and hope to God he doesn't take a paternity test? I just can not imagine calling my gf and having to say not only did I cheat on you but I'm having a baby with the other girl. Am I just freaking out unnecessarily? I mean if it all did come out in the wash that it was mine, I would do the right thing because I love the ex to death even with our somewhat rocky past, it's just not really part of the plan that I had formulated (probably marry current gf) since this happened months ago.

Cliff notes: Cheated on current gf with ex one night. Months pass, find out ex is pregnant. There is at least a remote possibility it is mine. What to do?

[TomCollins]

KKF?

[XXXNoahXXX]

[Chorus]
These are my confessions
Just when I thought I said all I can say
My chick on the side said she got one on the way
These are my confessions
Man I'm grown and I dont know what to do
I guess I gotta give you part 2 of my confessions
If I'm gonna tell it then I gotta tell it all
Damn near cried when I got that phone call
I'm so gone and I don't know what to do
But to give you part 2 of my confessions

[Verse 1]
Now this gon' be the hardest thing I think I ever had to do
Got me talkin' to myself askin' how I'm gon' tell you
'bout that chick on part 1 I told ya'll I was creepin' with, creepin' with
Said she's 3 months pregnant and she's keepin' it
The first thing that came to mind was you
Second thing was how do I know if it's mine and is it true
Third thing was me wishin' that I never did what I did
How I ain't ready for no kid and bye bye to our relationship

[Chorus]
These are my confessions
Just when I thought I said all I can say
My chick on the side said she got one on the way
These are my confessions
Man I'm grown and I don't know what to do
I guess I gotta give you part 2 of my confessions
If I'm gonna tell it then I gotta tell it all
Damn near cried when I got that phone call
I'm so gone and I don't know what to do
But to give you part 2 of my confessions

[Verse 2]
Sitting here stuck on stupid tryna figure out
When, what, and how I'mma let this come out of my mouth
Said it ain't gon' be easy
But I need to stop thinkin', contemplatin'
Be a man and get it over with (over with)
I'm ridin' in my whip
Racin' to her place
Talkin' to myself
Preparin' to tell her to her face
She open up the door and didn't want to come near me
I said one second baby
Please hear me

[Chorus]
These are my confessions
Just when I thought I said all I can say
My chick on the side said she got one on the way
These are my confessions
Man I'm grown and I don't know what to do
I guess I gotta give you part 2 of my confessions
If I'm gonna tell it then I gotta tell it all
Damn near cried when I got that phone call
I'm so gone and I don't know what to do
But to give you part 2 of my confessions

[Breakdown]
And this by far is the hardest thing I think I've ever had to do
To tell you, the woman I love
That I'm having a baby by a woman that I barely even know
I hope you can accept the fact that I'm man enough to tell you this
And hopefully you'll give me another chance
This ain't about my career
This ain't about my life
It's about us
Please

[Chorus]
These are my confessions
Just when I thought I said all I can say
My chick on the side said she got one on the way
These are my confessions
Man I'm grown and I don't know what to do
I guess I gotta give you part 2 of my confessions
If I'm gonna tell it then I gotta tell it all
Damn near cried when I got that phone call
I'm so gone and I don't know what to do
But to give you part 2 of my confessions

[Edge34]

[Milo]

Baby's due date is calculated from onset date of last menstrual period. Find out her due date and Google "pregnancy calculator." You will be able to calculate the date of her LMP from this. If you banged her somewhere about two weeks after her LMP, then you may be her baby daddy. While this is far from foolproof, if you are more than a month off (which sounds possible), then you are likely in the clear. If the dates coincide, or are within a few weeks, then you need to have a talk with her (rather than OOT). Assuming she and her BF were [censored] on a regular basis, it is still more likely his than yours, but you need to be discuss this with her.

If you are the baby daddy, you will have to cowboy up and accept your responsibilities as a father. Obv you will have to tell your current GF as well.

Oh, and stop [censored] other people when you are in a relationship. Take some responsibility here, Mr. "Things happen, and we end up sleeping together." I always find it amusing how people use the passive voice when they are revealing their [censored] ups.

[MissT74]

From a woman's perspective:

She either knows or doesn't. She's obviously claiming the current BF is the father (to prevent drama for herself, not because of you) so unless he doesn't trust her, there will be no paternity test and the baby is "his".

If he does test and it's not his, then and ONLY then do you step up and offer a test. For now, she's giving you an out. Take it.

T

[tuq]

[ QUOTE ]
KKF?

[/ QUOTE ]
I'm inclined to agree but an IP check returned nothing. Never seen that before.

[RedRover]

whether or not it's yours she is going to say it's the current BFs, so take it and don't rock the boat

[Selfish Gene]

This is a huge, unexpected windfall for you.

[XXXNoahXXX]

What It Do?