Ozi-HomeGameaments Part 2
NOTE: INSERT NSFW WARNING HERE
So its Friday night about a month later and we get 9 people show up. No first timers. The pregame talk centers around the fact that for a bit more juice we are getting a topless girl to come and serve drinks, deal cards and basically lets us stare at her puppies for 4 hours. The pics we get as appetisers are NSFW (no nudity though, sry) so Ill only give the links
here and
here
B, as we shall call her, paints a pretty picture. Visually pleasing. The nods of approval when she arrived were testament enough. Someone announces that there shall be no unloading and that toilet breaks are strictly limited to 2 minutes max. It turns out however that B is ‘all business and no funny business’. Each attempt to get a group photo of the boys and the puppies was unsuccessful. She had clearly dealt cards before as she could burn like a pro which was a change of pace because we’ve got rid of burning for the previous months game because of problems we had when people forgot to burn a card on key hands Mind you, if B did fail to burn at any point in time then no one noticed. Do you see why?
Game #1: Okay, game 1. 8 handed. B is dealing obv, Seat 1 is the resident CallingStation (for obv reasons…he never folds), Seat 2 is ‘Fast Learner” (new to the game but picking it up quickly…can bet aggressively), Seat 3 is Hero (with a perfect position on the end of the table for reads and puppies), Seat 4 is TheBrit (LAG who plays semi-okay…maybe 3rd best after me and Chipman. TheBrit has played online once in a while and would be a fish but not relative to this table.), Seat5 is Ultra-Lag (very aggressive with draws and loves to get all in with F-All if he thinks youll fold), Seat6 is Chipman (see prev report…the 2nd best player at the table), Seat 7 is MrWhatTheHell (as in “what the hell, Im all in”), Seat 8 is TheScot (who can be tricky and aggressive and laggy, plays reasonably solid and always in or around the bubble. 4th best player IMHO).
After the last evening went til 2am because we started late it was already decided to go with a more aggressive blnd structure. 10000 starting chips
100 – 200 15 mins
200 - 400 15 mins
400 - 800 15 mins
500 - 1,000 15 mins
1,000 - 2,000 15 mins
2,000 - 4,000 15 mins
5,000 - 10,000 10 mins
7,500 - 15,000 10 mins
10,000 - 20,000 Til Busto
This obviously makes it a mega-turbo game as hands are dealt slowly. I calculate we get about 8 hands per level. Obv I’d be much happier with deeper stacks and longer between rises so that I Can exploit my edge but I don’t make the rules so whatever.
So, the usual stuff happens, ie I get dealt junk and play preflop like a nit. I get one playable hand in first 2 levels. J10o in MP. CallingSTation is UTG limps with any two. Im about to limp in and TheBrit announces RAISE and sticks in 1500. I berate him for acting out of turn and fold. In hindsight I should have raised something like 800 to see if I can slow him down and make him just call because I have like AA. This would be great for my image LOL. Anyway he flashes me AJs. Flop is Q9x. There is some betting. Turn is a brick and river is the 8. doh.. A crappy pair wins an stupidly large pot something around 15-20k. I would have probably felted with an OESD obv resultorientaments.
Then I get do get Qjoff on the button but fold it when Chipman raises 5x BB UTG. I refuse to bust out early. Ultra-LAG is the bigstack but drops a fair chunk of it to CallingStation when he flops a set, CS asks for the hand ranking sheet, rivers a full house and gets Ultra-LAG to push all in with K high. LOL.
As an aside, about 5 hands in I say to “FastLearner” you haven’t been playing many cards and he says that “Im copying you” as he’s noticed ive been lasting a long time in the games and He knows I play online for cash. He meant it sincerely and that he also points out that I don’t play much but when I do I bet bet bet. Damn straight!. If I could have a prodigy in the group he is the one guy I think I could teach to play. Unfortunately he busts out early after multi-barrelling against ChipMan with A high thereby helping with the read I have on Chipman who is less likely to fold to a bluff than I give him credit for. He is still the most bluffable of the group but still that bluff will only work if he has nothing. He calls down with a piece of the board when if anyone bets into him and raises mainly monsters.
Then comes the hand Ive been waiting for. Blinds are at 500/1000 and MrWhatTheHell just busted when UTG so Chipman who is also the rules man (I help out but Im sick of them not understanding why we should draw for seats etc and it just makes me look to serious LOL) says no-one can miss a posting a big blind so only SB is forced to post (Chipman is SB). I have 8000 and get dealt KJs. This is like Aces for me…Qjo, J10, 79s have been my best dealt hands so far and Ive already told the Puppies that whilst I’m not going to ask for a new dealer but she better start dealing me some action J
Anyway, it is 5 handed now with 2 lags to my left, Chipman in SB and TheScot in UTG. The Scot folds UTG. I consider pushing but since there is no BB and SB is only 500 I elect to raise 2000, leaving me enough to bail if called in multiple spots and the flop is horrid.. TheBrit and Ultra-Lag fold and SB looks at me and says “you are FOS”. In my head I give an almightly “O rly! You haven’t seem me bluff once and Im FOS. Haha”. Cards are dealt…KJx. Schawing! He again tells me Im full of it and bets 1000. Hmm I have 6000 and I push figuring he has a pair on the flop. He calls and shows AQo. Shipit….Turn is dealt…oh noes…10. Table roars and the river is dealt before I have time to request B give me a 4 outer. I mentally HIYACHAHCA and Tuff Fish’s themesong starts to play in my head. Beer me please! I then obv watch as Chipman and his huge chip lead go on to win game one. So I start to realise that even though Chipman is ok…he probably sucks at hand ranges and outs etc. Dude, I CLEARLY have a hand that I like. I probably have your AQ on the KJx flop dominated or worse and he should know that flopping a pair prob wont cut win it. LOL play bad get there. Har Har.
Game #2.
Before the deal, CallingStation steals my seat because he wants a better angle on the puppies. Obv possession is nine tenths of the law dang it.
The nit in me stays even though I resolve to play more cards because I am card dead once more.
I do limp A4o on the button when blinds are 100/200. Ultra-Lag donks 400 a 346flop. 2 Folds. I raise to 1000. We go HU to the turn where a Q falls. He bets 500. I call (a mistake…perhaps throw in a blocking raise and take free river if offered). River is J and completes a runner flush. He pushes all in and the entire table is winding me up telling me to call. I sense a bluff but I just don’t want to risk busto (I still have a reasonable stack if I fold) and fold and he is convinced enough to show A3o and get I get my A4o into the muck asap. Showing not good for my already nitty rep. LOL @ Damn Ultra-Lag. I now have a pretty good read on him that he goes all in to bluff. Normally he busts out with this move if given time.
Play continues with me folding a lot but at least Im getting drunkern. Then blinds get to 500/1000 quickly and I get Aqo in SB and there is a raise in front of me by TheBrit and called by Chipman. I Squeeze Chipman and push all in with about 7000. Callingstation is shortstack and calls as do the rest. I don’t remember the details but Chipman does the numbers and there are at least 2 sidepots. KQx flop and blank turn and river and Chipman triples up with a decent mainpot with K10s. Damn it. Obv rigged. and I split with TheBrit when he has AQ. I think I get my money back because CallingStation donated with more chips than Chipman. Was complicated J
I then lose a hand to someone that I have no clear memory of, someone Busts and then I bust out when I lose with 46o in the bigblind for 3rd place and my money back. LOL DONKAMENTS.
Chipman goes on and beats TheBrit to take both games. In all seriousness, he did quite well and probably deserved the wins.
Summary So far:
So my results in these games (2 per night with X/Y as place and number of players) have been 3/9, 3/8, 1/5, ¾, 1/8, 2/7, 5/8, 3/8.
Im trying to marshall support for an earlier start and longer games because as fun as they are, I really don’t get to play much poker in these games and want to do more than outplay people before the turn.
2+2…you got this far…now help me adjust
So, basically Im playing like a nit and want to play more hands but I just cant bring myself to play crap hands for raises against these guys even though I know the implied odds are high. Mostly folding for an hour then getting all in for one hand is boring, Ive been called FoldemGuy and I want to play some decent poker instead of fold and push poker. I think Ive got decent reads on most of the regulars now to gambol a lot more and even though I seem to get action even when I dont play a hand for ages its just not that much fun and not optimal IMHO. FWIW Ive finished 3rd too often. Chipman on the otherhand has won 4 times and busted the other times and him given our payout structure is 3rd = money back (and about a 2:1 spilt between 1st and 2nd he is profiting and having more fun than I am. He seems more flops than me and usually either busts or doubles/triples up in the first hour. Ive noticed he is prepared to call down big bets with just a flopped top or 2nd pair regardless of kicker. I need to be less of a bubble boy and more of a FTW boy.
So Im thinking that in the next game I follow the following strategy (bear in mind its a 10000 starting chips and 100/200 then 200/400 for first 2 levels...about 1 orbit each) which is
- dont look at my cards and limp in if unraised
- if it is raised behind me or raised in front of me I can look at my cards and decide what it do
- I dont 'announce' my strategy and wait for someone to notice (remember we use porno cards so before each flop there is much study. At the games ive tried not looking at my cards til its my turn to act and instead I watch other people for tells and no none even notices I haven’t looked at my cards. Hehe.
- I then play poker postflop with huge implied odds when I hit
- once blinds get to level 3 or if I get below say 75% of my stack then I can revert to actually looking at my cards
- I can abort of anyone obviously starts taking advantage of my no look limps
You likey?
I figure I dont need to do this for long to make a point as I can tighten the [censored] up at an appropriate point. Any suggestions on loosening up (gimmicks or otherwise) are welcome. mkay thankski.
Failing that, I just need to open my starting range from my usually nitty range.
Hope you enjoyed this report and much as I did typing it.