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Old 07-16-2007, 10:55 AM
jschaud jschaud is offline
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Default local article--poker isnt a sport--near clemson SC

I don't think poker is a sport

By Scott Adamson
Sunday, July 15, 2007

Remember when you were in school and your mom would keep you home because you were sick, then when you returned you were behind on your assignments?

I ask because I’m obviously behind on my assignments.

I must’ve missed the day when poker became a sport.

You can scroll through Associated Press or go to traditional sports Web sites, and you’ll quickly find out all you need to know about the World Series of Poker.

For example, the event pays out $59.8 million, and the grand prize winner will rake in an impressive $8.25 million.

By the way ESPN has been showing most of the action, and if you want to see the finals, which are set for Tuesday, you can.

They’ll be broadcast on ESPN pay-per-view.

Pay-per-view!

This raises so many questions I have no idea where to begin.

First of all, these people are playing cards. They are not running complex pass routes or using their hand/eye coordination to hit a baseball or pulling up and smoothly releasing a shot that will send a basketball through a small cylinder from 22 feet away.

They are playing cards.

It has always been my philosophy — and perhaps it’s just me — that if you can sit at a table while drinking beer and eating Cheetos, you are not participating in a sport.

You are merely playing a game.

If the World Series of Poker is a sport, then so is Monopoly, Yahtzee, UNO, Chutes and Ladders, Clue, Candyland, etc.

In fact, if the World Series of Poker is a sport then so is playing video games.

And since video gaming is a sport I’m a bit upset that ESPN didn’t televise one of my recent accomplishments.

NCAA Football 2007 has a create-a-team feature, so through the magic of fantasy and technology I became head coach and puppet master of the Anderson University Trojans Division 1-A football team.

During the 2017 season the club finished 13-0 and defeated Michigan State 41-20 in the Rose Bowl.

Why was this not reported?

And where is my share of the $59.8 million?

Even more absurd that poker would be considered a sport is that it’s on TV.

What’s there to watch?

Dude looks at a card, dude puts card on a table, dude eats a Cheeto.

That’s not sports — that’s a 15-minute break at work.

Obviously someone cares or ESPN wouldn’t show it. And sadly, apparently there are people who will actually pay to watch this stuff on TV because it wouldn’t be offered on pay-per-view unless the “worldwide leader in non-sports coverage” thought it could make a buck.

I consider myself to be a man of the people and will always make a concerted effort to serve you, the reader.

However if you, the reader, think poker is a sport, we’re just going to have to agree to disagree.

But I’ll be glad to discuss the issue over a beer and bag of Cheetos.

I’ll even bring the cards.

http://www.independentmail.com/news/...k-poker-sport/
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