I need to set this story up correctly, or else it probably won't make a ton of sense.
I was hanging out with my roommates (3 of us) and one mutual friend. We will call him 'Mike'.
'Mike' has a history of not handling his alcohol very well and easily blacking out. In the past during blackout mode he has (while sleeping) pissed on his girlfriend, one of my roommates clothes, as well as pissed on himself.
Two nights ago, the five of us were rocking out. (Yes, on a Tuesday) and drinking a bit. I go to sleep first, say my peace and head to bed. This leaves my 3 other roommates and 'Mike'. Soon after I go to sleep, 2 of my roommates also head to sleep, leaving one of my roommates up, drinking as well as making food with 'Mike'.
I wake up and head to school around 11:30. I stumble downstairs, and put on my shoes in the living room, all the while being basked in an unpleasant aroma that highly resembles [censored]. I look around, see 'Mike' sleeping on our couch, think to myself he must be busting ass, or had a ton of garlic the night before, and don't think too much more of it.
Around 1:30 pm, I get home from class, and the house still smells like poop. 'Mike' is gone, but in the living room I notice a huge log laid on our carpet.
Exhibit A
Exhibit B
And some more evidence that makes it appear that someone has stepped in the log, and tracked it around.
Exhibit C
I immediately go upstairs, find one of my roommates, and start bitching to him about how someone took a [censored] in our living room. I call my other two roommates, and one of them calls 'Mike' at work and asks him if he took a [censored] in our living room. 'Mike' was very upset that we would even think he took a dump in our living room.
A couple side notes, We have a back door, that we all believe was closed that night, but its possible it was open leaving just the screen door closed. The screen has been ripped a bit in the bottom corner, and if an animal is trying to, could push the screen in and come inside. So it is possible (although highly unlikely) that some animal, in the middle of the night pushed in our screen door, came inside, laid a giant turd, and then left back out the screen door.
So OOT, we come to you to solve our crime. If more information is needed to help you solve the crime, feel free to ask away and I will try to answer your questions.
My roommates and I have come up with a few plausible scenarios, which I will list in poll form.
Cliff notes: Giant turd laid in our living room after a night of drinking. Who did it?
Edit:
Exhibit D showing scale.