[Dominic]

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Well, like you said (though I snipped it), people are different. It's only happened in a couple cases, but I'll be with a female friend I like and find attractive. The sum is greater than it's parts and something will happen, a shared joke, excited about the same band/book/movie, whatever that brings a moment of emotional closeness. In that moment, I'll feel this wave of affection and I'll feel the urge to caress her cheek and kiss her.

I think, for me (if an attraction is present anyway) I instinctively want to show my happiness by physical actions that give pleasure.

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I have to say you sound like a hoot of a friend. I really appreciate your candor in this thread and have been enjoying reading your posts while I sit here at work. I've never met anyone who got the urge to be so affectionate just upon the sharing of a joke or discussion of a movie [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]. You sound fun.

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Heh, you make it sound like "Hey, nice smile, let's make out!". It's a far deeper, complicated and slow process than that. The movie/joke/dinner would be a trigger or catalyst for feelings already present.

An example, from long ago. In college there was a girl I had classes with and we grew to be friends. She wasn't really my type so this didn't present a problem for me. She was attractive, just not my type.

So, a year goes by. We hang out between classes and such. We don't do much outside of school, but we're pretty close. Hug each other good bye, say things in confidence. She had a boyfriend that was a jerk (well, then I only heard her side). Sometimes she'd cry as she told me about something stupid he did.

I felt for her. She was a good person, she was cute. She hurt and she deserved better. At one point we were laughing in the student lounge about something, I felt that part of me that would love to give her those things she deserved, to take some of that pain and replace it with postive feelings, and I felt myself want to kiss her. I didn't though, I'm more discplined that that, and she never had a clue.

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YGOS?

I'm kidding! I know exactly what you mean, I just couldn't help myself. [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]