[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Nobody else use this thing, because you can't copy/paste from here
http://www.willselfdestruct.com/secure/pxivv449
[/ QUOTE ]
ORLY?
[/ QUOTE ]
OOOOORLY?
Yo adanthar, I"m the idiot who wrote to you earlier who while losing his virginity was used as a human maxi pad by the Patchouli smelling flower girl.
Anyways I got some more stupid chit to confess. So when I was like 16,17 years old i worked in a sports memorabilia shop. We sold autographed plaques, sports cards, etc. Anyways my boss would leave me alone to run the store when he had to go out of town hunting down autographs. Anyways it was summer time and there were always hot chicks walking around my town and [censored]. They"d always walk by and [censored] smiling at me and giving me the eye. Now i was a horny little mother fker waiting to explode. Anyways one day they walk by again
and I just get really worked up so the only thing i could thing of was to run downstairs in the basement and rub out a quickie. Not a good decision. I started jerking off at work pretty much almost everytime i was left alone lolz. I think my record was like 4 times in one shift . Not sure what it was but i would jsut feel the urge and go crazy. It was weird cuz here i am spanking it in the basement of his store and it was like a [censored] old nasty basement. It was like jerking off in a fking dungeon and [censored]. Would be weird cuz people would come in the store or call and i"m sitting there with dick in hand. Running upstairs and trying to act all normal hahaha.
It was a [censored] dream job, who else can say they got paid to work with sports memorabilia and charm the cobra! Word.
Anyways another time I knew this chick from highschool and me and one of my friends used to go to her house and hang out all the time. Well she developed a crush on me and i wish i could say she was smoking hot but unfortunately she wasn"t. She had a pancake azz, no titties and yes, she was a little on the "pleasantly plump" side, cool chick don"t get me wrong. So she has a keg party one night everyone is getting tore up and she keeps giving me the eye the hole night. Early on while i only had a couple beers in me i was like "helllllll nooooo" to myself. But 3 hours and way to many drinks later i was like "eh, she"s not that bad, i think i"m gonna tap that azz tonight." Beer is a motherfker. So everyone leaves and we start kissing and whatever. We go to her bedroom. We start going at it. Now let me give you a piece of advice, if you are going to fk with a fat chick, do not, i repeat DO NOT LET THEM BE ON TOP.
It was like being mounted by Babar the elephant. And she started going at it like a swine in heat. It was extremely painfull, I had to stop. So while she is pounding away and smashing my pelvic bone into pieces i"m trying to
think of some [censored] to make up. I"m like "We can"t do this" She"s like "what are you talking about" So I tell her i met a chick in NYC cuz i had just gotten back from there visiting family. Lol it worked like a charm! She dismounted, I was relieved and able to breath now. At the time it seemed like a good idea but i think if [censored] me over cuz now she is loving me long time because she thinks i"m some great boyfriend material who wouldn"t cheat (even though technically i was allready if i had indeed had a gf in nyc, which i didn"t. Probably the worst thing I did though was go to her house after rolling my face off on x at the club with her. Next thing i know i"m fingering and eating her snatch out lol! Yet another poor choice by me but i was rolling on x, and x is a hell of a drug. Now she REALLY loved me long time cuz i made her bust a nut and i think i was the first guy to make her cum. Needless to say she wouldn"t leave me alone for months but eh, it was my fault i guess and i kinda felt bad for her. Oh and yet again my finger ended up smelling like a freshwater pike for a week.
I"m done for now next time in part 3 i will tell about my embarrassing trip to the emergency room after doing to much GHB [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]