[Fast Food Knight]

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Also, her/your hpv infection is almost surely not the wart causing kind, or you would have noticed it by now.

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Correct. There are many strains of HPV and the kinds that yield pap smear results are NOT the kinds that result in warts. Be compassionate, and no, she didn't necessarily cheat on you because the symptoms can lie dormant for a long time (or, like others had said, you may be a carrier).