[mostsmooth]

i drive like 3-4 hours a day on the GSP. i flip out all the time.
1. if theres 4 lanes of stopped traffic, there is no magical fast lane. you dont need to switch lanes every ten feet. the other people arent sitting there because theyre stupid (most of them are stupid, but thats not why theyre sitting in traffic), you arent discovering some secret trick that nobody is aware of. just stay in your [censored] lane.
2. when the road is jammed up and stopped, that doesnt give you the right to ride on the shoulder. i wish there would be no repercussions for ramming my car into you or running you into the woods.
3. when theres a long line for an exit and you have to get off, get in line like everybody else. dont ride in the middle lane until the last second and try to cut in. you are the reason the traffic grinds to a halt at most of the friggin exits, youre the jerkoff who is stopped in a through lane waiting for a spot to sneak in to the exit lane. you should be shot.
4. if theres a cop on the side of the road and has somebody pulled over, you dont need to slow down. hes not going to jump in his car and chase you down. hes busy, keep driving.
5. tow trucks have been around for years, theres nothing really new about them. if you are truly facinated by tow trucks, go to a auto garage and stare at them all day. dont slow down to 30mph to get a good look at them on the parkway.
6. you dont need to stop and look at an accident on the side of the road, just friggin drive.
7. you really really really dont need to slow down and look at traffic accidents ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PARKWAY. I DONT NEED TO SIT IN AN EXTRA HOUR OF TRAFFIC GOING NORTH WHEN THERE IS AN ACCIDENT SOUTHBOUND.
8. when the parkway goes from 2 lanes into 3, this is not a reason for traffic to become more congested. keep moving, you dont need to slow down. theres nothing to be scared of.
9. dont ride on my fing bumper and dont flash me your precious highbeams. if im in your way, its because i cant get out of your way. i know your there, i have mirrors.
10. if you do feel the need to flash your high beams/ride my ass and im doing 75, when i am able to get out of your way, please go faster than 76 as you pass me.
11. no matter how fast you are going or how fast you think is appropriate, if youre not passing anybody, move out of the left lane you retart.
12. the world is not your ashtray, youre cigarette butts dont go out the window. and youre not really fooling anybody when you dry to drop them low so nobody sees. and youre not fooling anybody when you hang on to them for a second or two and then let it go as if you dropped it by mistake.
13. if im in the toll plaza and i take more than 5 seconds, theres a reason. im not sitting there for fun, i dont need to hear your horn. your horn makes my foot slam on my brakes and you might have to sit there for 30 seconds or more.
14. if cant open your car door in a parking lot and have the common courtesy to not hit my car, please kill yourself.
15. rain does not equal ice. you do not have to drive 45mph just because theres a little rain coming down.
16. please try to figure out how to shut off your fing highbeams? why are you driving all night with your highbeams on?
17. if there 5 cars in one line of the toll plaza, and 4 in the other, you dont need to switch lanes.
18. when the red light is on at the toll plaza, that lane is closed.
19. dont flash me your lights to tell me theres a cop nearby, especially if there isnt one.
20. mind your own business. you dont need to blow your horn at me and make gestures just because im driving and reading a book. i saw you on your cell phone, go f yourself.
thats all i can think of for now.