[ElSapo]

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Now, I'm 31 years old. I've been with my girlfriend a while now, and while I'm not out in bars trying to pick up random chicks I still feel the same "could I?" in the back of my mind. That same question, that same need for validation.

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I'm getting married in 9 weeks and I still occasionally have thoughts like these. I'm pretty sure it's completely standard. But are these thoughts/anxieties actually driving your actions? It seems like OP is not just talking about the urge to have sex, but how that shapes the rest of our behavior.

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I'd have to say yes. From talking to random girls in bars (even now, I suppose) to my actions when I was younger, I think it's more action-oriented and less theortical.

On the flip side, if everyone says I'm normal I can run with that also.

But really, rarely did I care how attractive someone was. I always felt like what I really wanted to know was, "will she?"