[goofyballer]

I've actually gotten fairly good at not putting the pussy on a pedestal lately. Fairly sure that's how I was able to land the Sacramento chick.

Anyway, HUGE MFING BEAT: I got an e-mail saying my company had set up my E-trade account for managing stock options, so I load it up and discover that despite starting on Aug. 6, my stock option grant date was Nov. 1. I e-mailed a guy that handles that type of stuff and he says the board only approves stock options once a quarter, which happened to be Nov. 1 (2 months and 26 days after I started).

If the stock went down between when I started and now then this would be awesome, but during that three month period, company stock went up by about $2.50, meaning that my 2,500 stock options are going to be worth about $6,300 less than they would if I had started work a week earlier (after they vest over 4 years - I can't collect on stock options until I've worked for a year, at which point it will cost me $1575, and then $131.25 per month thereafter).

WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME THIS BEFORE I STARTED ASDIFOASDJFPASODF

I also missed the start date for the current 6-month period of the employee stock purchase plan (buy company stock at 15% off the price at the start or end of the period, whichever is lower; so you're guaranteed 15% profit if the stock goes down, more if it goes up) by 6 days by virtue of when I started. Gay.