View Single Post
  #3  
Old 11-26-2007, 12:05 PM
Kimbell175113 Kimbell175113 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: The art of losing isn\'t hard to master.
Posts: 2,464
Default Re: Critique My Personal Statement

Quick nitty thing: the first sentence is not correct, ducy?

'Unlike some' applies to 'my interest' - the subject of the sentence and the thing closest to 'unlike some' - when you meant it to apply to you yourself. You can change it to

[ QUOTE ]
Unlike some, I became interested in pharmacy very recently.

[/ QUOTE ]

or whatever. This corrects the modifier stuff and takes away that nasty passive voice that Microsoft Word is always bugging you about.

Yeah, it's a little thing, but if a nit happens to read this, it'll affect his first impression of you.
Reply With Quote