[disjunction]

Ha, I find myself yet again reading a lounge thread and finding that I come from a complete opposite perspective. From the dating conversation, not the amusing OP. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] In a way I think it goes back to the same thing, I'd love to hang out with my co-workers outside of work, and others wouldn't.

What I find irritating about the Internet is the lack of trust, even though it is necessary. IRL I am one of the nicest, most trustworthy people you will ever meet. And it's not easy, either. Sometimes doing the right thing is hard work. IRL I think this becomes pretty clear about me pretty quickly. Thus, my interactions are almost always with people who trust me and who like me.

On the Internet it's the opposite. I get lumped in with 20 other jerks who just scammed 20 other jerks out of $20. Or whatever it is that goes on on 2+2. I weighed in, in a small way, to a statistical issue on another forum. The response I got was "just because you can't understand the math here doesn't give you the right to say it's wrong", or something like that. As if I were some jerk opining on things I know nothing about. (for those who don't know me here, I claim to be someone who will be getting a PhD in Computer Science in 2 years, and Computer Science is very little about computers, it's basically math). It's just so hard to have a decent conversation when you have to spend half your time defending your credibility.

A couple years ago I tried dating on the Internet. And the thing I hated was how many girls (about half) felt free to be rude, because I was just some random dude on the Internet. Probably a dude similar to the last guy who didn't call the next morning, or whatever. My worst dating story wasn't with one of those rude girls, it was on a 2nd date. I submit it for your mockery:

The date was going great. We clicked together and had a good dynamic. From a lot of girls perspective, if they are nerds, I was a pretty good catch. I was smart, I liked smart women, physically I was at least some people's "type", I could hold a conversation, and at the time I was making near 6 figures. (now I'm older, I'm a student and I'm lucky when a paycheck breaks 4 figures, so I'm not such a catch anymore!) Only one thing was a little odd, after dinner and before the show she started asking me random questions about myself. It could have been a bad attempt small-talk, I dunno. Or it could have been a result of mistrust. But her questions were the type I ask when I have someone's resume in front of me. In any case, everything else went great, the show went great (we made eye contact several times), and things were well so I offered her a ride home (in my city, with me driving in the other direction and public transportation so easy, this would be a bit of a break of custom if it were a friend or a first date or something). She said yes. Here's where disjunction shows how unsmooth he is with the ladies: I took a wrong turn to my car. After that became apparent she panicked, she said "Now I'm not getting that vibe from you, but if you're planning on trying something, don't"... or something like that. Trying something? Yeah I was going to try something. I was going to try driving you home and seeing if you'll invite me in. I offered to flag her a cab right there but she said it was ok. She did say a minute later, "I'm probably overreacting, I mean I did already agree to get in your car." Good point! The worst part is, her reaction was completely understandable. I was just some random dude she met on the Internet. I felt like crap and cursed myself for never remembering where I park. A couple of minutes later, we found the car and I drove her home. But I never asked her out on a third date, and after that debacle, it's more likely than not that she wouldn't have wanted one. I don't know why, but I lost my taste for online dating after that.