[fishyak]

Story 1: Little Criminals

To quote Elton John: "Saturday night is all right for fighting." So I must be playing 3/6 full kill O/8 at Commerce.

Two regulars are added to my table. These two are husband and wife. He is a nice guy, but an ex-dealer, plays O/8 a lot and isn't a source of $ on the table. His wife gets things off on the wrong foot when she insists on a certain seat over the heated request from one of our foreign grandmotherly types who is usually good for 2-3 racks. Grannie is overruled and leaves CRYING. Bad start.

Later I am in an unmemorable hand and by the river I am in the middle of the husband and wife. Husband bets out. Wife is on my immediate left. I am looking down rechecking my cards and what do I see? I see the little woman with her right hand separate 12 chips and move them forward literally right under my nose. The threat is clear to me, bet and you are facing my raise. I call anyway. She FOLDS. I SCOOP. I think this was clear but subtle collusion. I don't think anyone else saw her move. You make the call.

As I was leaving, (the table was in the middle of a typical O/8 blowup) I tried talking to husband about the issue straight up and private. Got a smiling blow off.

So Sunday, I am finishing up my 4/8 session and walk back to the O/8 area. My Little Criminals are not home. I speak to the floorman, Terry, who knows me and knows I am a problem solver, not a problem maker and simpy report what I encountered. Terry admits there isn't much she can do and I agree. I simply wanted to alert management and suggest that these two be separated whenever possible.

Any other suggestions?

Story Two: Perfect Timing

Sunday 4/8 with about 20 minutes to go before the 2X JP time runs out, we get a new player.

(WARNING: STEREOTYPES ABOUND IN THE FOLLOWING TALE. IF YOU FIND THEM DISTURBING, EXERCISE YOUR FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHT NOT TO READ! BY CONTINUING TO READ, YOUR CONSENT TO BEING EXPOSED TO STEREOTYPES WILL BE ASSUMED!!)

On my immediate right is seated a 30-ish stereotypical gold chain, open shirt, too much chest hair, thinning on top wild and crazy Eastern European accent kind of guy who wants to maniac up our table. For 10 minutes, his complaints are typical: "My cards suk, etc." I explain that I why I moved out of that seat. Actually, when the seat on my left opens I almost always slide to the left so that if someone like this guy is next in line, I get him on my right, not my left.

Not suprisingly about 10 minutes before the end of the 2X JP period, he asks for a setup. I ask that he wait just 10 minutes. He insists and calls the floorman. The vote at the table is 7 to 1 against the setup right away. Floorman backs the majority.

Now the guy won't give it up. He is yelling for a setup every 10 seconds. It escalates into two explicative filled episodes.

I make one last attempt to reason with the guy. I explain that he is now disrespecting not only the table, but the floorman who has already ruled on his request. He prefers to create a typical testasterone fest. His responses were classic. "I can buy and sell you. What kind of car you drive? Mine is nicer!" I look at the black guy on my left and say: "This is classic. Maybe we should just all whip ours out and see whose is biggest?"
Black guy: "Man, I HATE this kind of *hit." Absolutely 100% classic.

Meanwhile, we are playing poker and wild and crazy guy is maniacing up every hand. Most hands are seeing 4-6 people seeing capped PF hands. Maniac gets hit and is fairly short stacked but is still talking trash.

Next hand, I am on the Button (I am down about about 1 1/2 racks)and look down, joy of joys, I see AA. Come on boys, CAP IT UP!!! I get 6 people in capped PF and wild and crazy guy is now all in.

Flop is A(!!!)T2 with 2 hearts. Up we go and the number of sidepots continues to grow. Turn, NO HEART. Keep it going! River pairs the dueces! Go ahead, beat me, please!! But I just settle for the win, especially as the wild and crazy guys shows KK!!

I tip the dealer excessively and thank her for her "PERFECT TIMING."

It's not long before our wild and crazy guy decides that blackjack would be more fun for him!