[MicroBob]

all these dying cat tales have me reliving the tough decisions of when to put my cat down.
I really didn't think she was ready even though the cancer was eating up her mouth.
But in the end I think she had some okay days where she would still climb into my lap and purr and be all happy so I still think I probably only held onto her maybe 2+ days longer than I should have.

Man, having the decision of whether to try for really painful surgery that will end up making her miserable or letting her go on with the cancer for a little while longer was somewhat difficult for me. It was really helpful to be able to talk to my sister and she could tell me, "if it was my cat I wouldn't do the jaw-removal thing. It's extremely painful and difficult for most cats and might only extend their life for a few months anyway." etc etc.

Usually the vet just gives you the options without quite as much guidance and says, "it's up to you."
arrgh. How annoying.

A few days before I put her down she walked onto the balcony of my 2nd floor apartment and took a flying leap and wandered around the grounds. She had never done that before and I have to think she had instincts to get away and go off on her own.
At first I thought it was an accidental fall but I let her go onto the balcony again to see how she would react and she was definitely lining up to take another jump. She had instincts to go off on her own because it was her time I'm almost positive.

Over 2 years earlier she had taken a different fall I think although she might have gotten partly hit by a car instead. I didn't see it but she definitely had some kind of injury and she was down and injured. But then she scrambled away and I couldn't catch her.
I had to think that she just found a spot in the woods where she could probably curl-up and whatever injury she had to her head would do her in.
I was sure she was gone for good.

14 days later she stumbles back to the general area and my neighbor says she saw her. She was insanely thin and probably dehydrated. Vet gave her fluids and she recovered and was good to go for another 2 years.
I have to think that her wandering off that time was her instincts telling her to go curl up and die...except that somehow she actually didn't die and after a long rest/hibernation she somehow recovered.

It was really weird that my cat that I was sure had died somehow came back and said, "Hey..I'm back!"
I had already pretty much given up trying to find her after 4 or 5 days.