Re: Immoral philantrophy?
I don't see what the problem would be. You're helping people by giving money to charities. As such, any charity that gets your money will always help some people and not others. I wouldn't blame a cancer survivor from donating all of his or her charity money to cancer research or to help people with cancer. The bottom line is that it's your money so you can decide whom to help. As you say looking out for your own is pretty standard in terms of donating.
Also, not sure that it's relevant but I'm pretty sure antidiscrimination/civil rights laws don't affect charitable organizations.
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