[Vyse]

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i already gave you a reason. there is an implied contract between you and the server that you will tip.

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There's also an implied contract when I come up to a stop sign to, well, stop. But when there's no one there and it's late at night, I'm not going to fully stop, and who knows, maybe when I really need to get home and I'm dead tired and there's no one remotely around, I'll just go right through it without even slowing down. I'm sure that's something the majority of American drivers have done, and I doubt the common perception of them is being a douche.

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it is customary to do so.

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Wtf, it's also customary to open the door for women or just to hold open the door in general if someone is about to walk in. And I usually do it, but only because I feel like it and I think it's a good thing to do that costs me very little to nothing at all, not because it's customary. That is not a reason to do something, to be a sheep.

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you are receiving services in bad faith when you go in and say "live up to my random and unreasonable expectations and i will shower you with gifts."

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So if I let the waiter know beforehand that I will not tip unless they are excellent then it's in good faith?

lawl @ strawman. My expectations are unreasonable? What are my expectations again? Do you even know? I'm not randomly going into a Denny's and expecting the dudes to fall over me or something. Part of the reason I don't go out to restaurants is because it's so rare to find good service and I don't want to bother having to stab in the dark for it. If everyone was good at their jobs, I would have no problem tipping. If you're telling me I have to abide by a so-called implied contract because it's "customary" to do so regardless of performance, well, I give a big f-you to that contract.

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you know that the person is going to provide you a basic service with the expected return of a small cost, and you refuse to pay it.

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I only refuse to pay it if he doesn't do a good job. If I'm paying for it, it better be worth paying for. If it's not, I don't tip. That is far from unreasonable.

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so basically, you either go out to eat extremely rarely

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Correct.

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or you live somewhere you can hit-and-run on servers until they forget you and you can slither back in.

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?

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if there's nothing wrong with not tipping, why don't you go back there?

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Because if I'm not going to tip, it's because YOU WEREN'T GOOD ENOUGH TO SPEND MONEY ON. That includes the restaurant as a whole.

So why would I ever go back? I would be wasting money. Unfortunately they DO make you pay for the meal you ate, even if it sucks. Those are the breaks.

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or better yet, if almost every restaurant you go to fails to meet your expectations, why do you keep going out?

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I don't.

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because your story is just a cover for the fact that you're an antisocial cheapskate. or you're simply trolling/lying, another strong possibility.

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I'm actually extremely generous to people and services worth it. For example, I do tip when I get a haircut; even though I think it's preposterous I'm spending $15 on a cut, the dudes usually do a great job and, when my hair is dirty, they'll wash it without adding it on as a mandatory cost, etc. etc. So I tip $5 no problem.