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I'm a doctor who married another doctor. We both agree that it is a huge advantage having a spouse who understands the stresses of our jobs without question. It makes our lives much easier not to have to explain why we need to cancel plans, are just too tired to go out, need to vent, or don't feel like talking some days when we get home. That doesn't mean that it can't work, but you are going to need to be very flexible/understanding.

If she is serious about being a neurosurgeon then medical school will be the good times. Once residency starts, you won't be seeing nearly as much of her. She will be working long hours, including nights and weekends. Her free time will mostly be spent sleeping.

This isn't meant to be all doom and gloom. If your relationship is strong, then you will work it out. It's not such a unique situation. Plenty of successful relationships have made it through tough times where work has to take priority.

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I'm like the most flexible/understanding guy on the planet. I told her I'd be there to support her no matter what the cost and I'd be willing to go wherever she gets a residency. I was prepared to do what I needed to do.

I really don't mind not going out. I actually favor not going out to going out as I am money conscious. I like to just hang out and spend time together rather than being in a large group and banging into each other.

Well, we aren't together. She just called me a little bit ago and I was telling her about my 35 hour day and she basically got the attitude that she didn't have time to talk to me anymore.