[Blarg]

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They may still have to work together if he doesn't get fired/moved. Plus it can make Katy look bad/like a bitch. An email is documentation, if he is still unrelenting, then take it to HR. HR=End of working relationship, which could be bad for Katy's productivity and professional development.

Edit:
Oh yeah, he prolly wants to do u.

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I don't see how her working relationship with him could be much worse anyway. If Katy misses this opportunity to document her problems with the guy, she may never get another one anywhere near as powerful before he completely sabotages her career. Which it sounds like he's embarking on right now. Right now, she has the initiative in being the good guy and putting him in his place. If she doesn't act, she will lose it, and that would be a tactical disaster. Because then it will be time to listen to the boss, not to his now merely putatively disgruntled underling, when the issue of "the Katie problem" and her suitability for continued employment -- or promotion, God forbid -- comes up.

That is when she will be painted as looking bad or a b*tch. And it will work, too. Right now, she has a chance to defend herself that in no way will make her look like a b*tch. Really, if someone threatens to punch you in the face, especially in a work environment, that's the person who is going to look bad. Especially when doing it to a woman! The power is all Katie's in this situation, not his.

I'd stay away from e-mail too. Talking to this guy further, and directly, about this subject is the wrong thing. You want the emphasis here on management and what management is going to do, not on your personal relationship.

Two reason: One is that you don't want the situation to get out of hand further, and give him an opening to argue with you about deniability or whatever. Second is that what you want to be sure of is that this does not get brushed off as something personal, which will completely trivialize it and destroy any leverage this incident might give you. Katie needs that leverage now. What needs emphasis, to protect her career, is that she is not about people's personal problems and probably doesn't really even care about them; she's about getting the work done and being a professional in a professional environment. And something is intefering with that.

Handle it coolly but firmly, and you save your career, not to mention your emotional state. Dick around in it and minimize the situation, and you make the situation and the mindset of the initial offender, and everyone he thenceforth influences, permanent. She simply can't afford to play this off lightly and let this attitude toward her become publically acknowledged and acceptable. That's career suicide, and even if she keeps her job, it will probably be at great effort, wind up very distasteful and unsatisfying to her, and she'll find it very hard to advance in her career.

It's a mistake to see this merely as an incident. The most important thing is that it is a precedent. It has to be treated accordingly. Once you go start going down the road of someone who can or should be thought less of, there is no turning back.