[Cue-Ball 66]

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Sorry about the long post. Just 2 questions to wrap it up.
1. For the coming months: Monk style, or GA style?
2. Haven't come up yet, but sex with an ex is a bad idea (c/d)?

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Nice TR, I think I missed your earlier posts about this ex if you made them but it sounds like the situation sucks.

To be honest, it sounds to me like you're not even close to letting her go. You really need to. It's been said a million times and you said it yourself...being good friends right off the bat is NOT a good idea. NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT!!! I'm telling you, please don't do it. For your sake, for hers, for your friendships sake.

My first girlfriend I tried staying best friends with straight away (long distance too), and we talked on the phone almost every night for a few weeks. It went horribly, and eventually we stopped talking for months. Now, 3 years down the line...I talk to her on occasion and we're very close again...she even helped me through tough times in my last relationship.

My last relationship we tried it aswell (much closer proximity this time, both at the same college), but the whole time I was desperately trying to get back together with her. I spent so much time crying and telling her how much I still loved her...it was horrible. Looking back now I realise I probably didn't love her like I said I did, I was just [censored]-scared of being alone again. She was actually a pretty terrible girlfriend towards the end...not that I was perfect...but I digress...

Life got so much better for me when I just moved on...stopped spending time near her or with her and hung out with other groups of friends. Just try your best to hang out with mates as often as you can, make some new friends if you're in a position to do so... I started hanging out with my brother and his friends and it was amazingly good for me.

So in answer to your questions, just get out and have fun...I think you'll find if you do this and decrease contact with your ex (I know you don't want to but you have to - she'll understand, believe me) you'll find life much easier. You'll meet other girls and have a good time...if this leads to sexytimes, hooray, if it doesn't, hooray...it really doesn't matter.

The less time you spend with/talking to your ex, the more you'll see there's a lot of other awesome girls out there just waiting to be found...you never know where/how you'll find them.

Bottom line is you still love her and you need to stop. Any sex with her would set you back months. Don't.



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P.S. This is all just rambling/ranting and speaking from the heart and from my own experiences. I don't want to come across as condescending and telling you what to do, but after reading through it reads a bit that way. Not my intention.