* When I was 15 I was babysitting my neighbor's kids and leaned down to pet their dog. The ferocious beast jumped up and nearly took off my nose. I was holding it on my face on the way to the hospital. I have a scar from where it was reattached. The ferocious beast was a darling cocker spaniel, looked just like Lady from Lady and the Tramp.
* A few weeks ago I ran back up the down escalator to retrieve keys my buddy remembered. Long ass escalators so I figured it would be more efficient to run up 10 steps then go down 40 more and back up the other side. I finally learned why my mom always told me not to do that. At the last hard-fought step I tripped and my knee came down on the edge. Huge gash and I couldn't bend my knee or put weight on my leg for three weeks. The
Gulden Draak inspired such bravery, and the Gulden Draak kept me from feeling the pain.
* A couple weeks before that I was stuck on the Joker roller coaster at Magic Mountain with the seat too low. I never expected a roller coaster to take my anal V card.