[goodgrief]

IMHO you are an addict. I know, embarrassing to be addicted to weed, but there it is. Until you fix that, you can't fix anything. I think you need to join a support group and get real about getting away from the weed.

If you love your poker, and if you love this girl, then you need to get your head straight. You don't need to be a functional alcoholic (weed-aholic?) who comes home every day, immediately gets high, and is messed up everywhere in life except on the job. It sounds like NASA is getting the best of you, and you're short-changing your interests in poker, your own health, and your relationship. Why don't you deserve for YOU to get some of your best? You've got something going for you or you'd be screwing up on the job too. Build on that something.

As far as your emotions, tilt, and so on, hard to control your emotions when you are wasted most of your non-working waking hours isn't it? Honestly, I think you would have a whole lot going for you if you just got the weed out of your life now. Something in your soul spoke to you and told you to break up the bong. Listen to your inner knowledge. Weed is fine for some people. But it isn't fine for you. Walk away.