[Hoi Polloi]

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Dude, a world in which you of all people are an 'insensitive prick' is a world where the bar for sensitivity is set pretty [censored] high.

First thing you oughta to is take it a little easier on yourself, maybe. After that, I really don't know what to tell you, except that imo it's probably better to err on the side of unconditional squeeze-and-nuzzle style support, with less trying to reason. I blindly concur with the majority!

My unlimited condolences to y'all in your time of family crisis [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

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That's good advice and I second the condolences.

Here's a thought. Rationality is not needed in this situation. Support your wife emotionally, not rationally. That is, just listen and be there when she wants you to be there. After all, there's not much that's rational about losing someone who you're extremely close to. It's like a part of you is dying. Your wife is dealing with that; irrationally perhaps but then it is irrational.

Good luck.