[rothko]

[ QUOTE ]
"the story needs to end with a punch, not punch blah blah blah my heart fluttered."

Yeah, but I think the punch is in learning he's deaf.

[/ QUOTE ]

nobody cares about jackson. the story doesn't care and the reader doesn't care.

edit: on second thought, i'm gonna go with john on this one. disregard my previous comments on this point. in fact, i am insisting that you keep that angle in there. anyone who says that "the second paragraph is useless" is an obvious moron.