Re: Pregnant GF
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IMHO at this point, this is 95% your GF's decision as she is the one who will have to live with the consequences of the decision, whatever it is. (But, as you said, that is subject for a different thread.) I think her family realizes this even if she does not.
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He has to live with the consequences just as much as the girl.
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Hardly. If they decide to abort, the girl will be the one to endure whatever consequences (feelings of guilt, distancing from relatives, etc) there are from that decision 1000X more than the OP.
If they decide to have the child, the girl will be affected infinitely more than OP as she will be the one raising it and providing the bulk of support (financial, emotional, shelter, day-to-day care, etc) even if the OP decides to kick in some child support. I can easily foresee the OP rationalizing that he shouldn't have to pay child support since the GF broke her promise to have an abortion if she became pregnant (again, IMHO). Even if the OP pays child support, I can assure you it won't cover half the cost of rasing the child. I'm assuming the OP will bail if no abortion is forthcoming. Even if he stays, this situation has likely put a rift in their relationship that will never be healed.
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You seem to think that the guy has the option to bail while the girl does not. I just don't agree with your original sentiment that it should be 95% the girl's decision. In a perfect world, I believe it should be a 50%/50% decision. Obviously there has to be some sort of tiebreaker and society has decided that the girl gets the edge cause it's her body. I don't agree with that solution but I can't think of a better one. Saying that the guy gets almost no say is completely wrong IMO though.
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