[El Diablo]

Sucker,

I moved your post here because I think it is a VERY important part of what should be discussed in this thread.

I agree completely with you about restaurants like that, and pretty much avoid them.

When I think of perfect service at restaurants, it's as if I don't notice the wait staff is there, except when I need something. The wait staff is ATTENTIVE, but not INTRUSIVE. This means that they have a good pulse of when I need another drink and magically appear right about the time I'm thinking "hmmm, almost ready for another drink."

If they are at the table and my wine glass is 2/3 empty, they'll offer to top me off. But they are not hovering about pouring two sips of wine into my glass every few minutes.

I enjoy having a pleasant relationship with the waiter, but I'm not looking to make best friends with the waiter at a place like this either. I want enough information to be able to make good decisions, and that's just about it. A good waiter is a good communicator. He can take cues from a customer as to whether or not they give a damn about where exactly the mushrooms came from.

The Dining Room at Ritz Carlton, Gary Danko, and Quince are three I listed that do this very well. There are many others that also fit the bill. Michael Mina is one restaurant that has a lot of the problems that irritate you. I'll get around to a review of that soon.

It sounds to me like you've been somewhat unlucky with your high-end dining experiences. I've definitely experienced what you are talking about, but I've also experienced a completely different level of service that many in this thread allude to as well. You really need to experience that type of place.