[danzasmack]

In highschool I had 2 jobs - first at Macy*s then as a lifeguard. The lifeguard gig was awesome and probably the best job I ever had. Everybody there loved me and I played Chinese Poker all day long and picked up chicky babes in the brief stints I was "single" while there.

Macy*s was awful. They had people always watching you. At one point I walked up to the counter to ask somebody something (i was new there) and I made a joke. The guy laughed. The phone rang and the guy on the phone said "can you make it at least LOOK like you're doing work?" I probably did more there than 1/2 of the staff combined, which really wasn't a good idea. Because I wasn't a complete idiot they would just stick me all over the place. I did inventory on damaged good, security stuff, women's, men's, kid's sections and even sold the shoes, watches jewelry. Usually you are assigned to a section and such but they just tossed me around.

The worst thing was folding ties. You know how the ties are all arranged in a neat manner on a table? yeah I had to do that. It wasn't a big deal except then tony provologne who hasn't had to wear a shirt in the last 14 years comes and picks up 3 of them which messes up the whole table. Running around folding clothes was awful.

My freshman year of college I worked contstruction for a guy through my stepdad. This was hillarious. It was me and a bunch of russians who spoke like 4 words on english. They sent me out to get their lunch every day, which consisted of bogus chinese food and various beers. I was 18 at the time and told them I couldn't buy beer (and they couldn't drink on the job!) but they sent me anyway. One of the best conversations I've ever had:

Me: "Ok so you want chicken wings?"
Russian #1: "No, get me the chicken."
Me: "What chicken?"
Russian #1: "Yes."
Me: "What do you want?"
Russian #2: "Nothing I am on diet."
Me: "Oh, so you don't want lunch?"
Russian #2: "No lunch, just 2 beer. Good beer."
Me: "No lunch, two beer."

They used to make me drink with them just so we'd all get fired if we got caught.

The guy who ran the crew was awful and they went bankrupt.