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here is a diy with pics:
gather ingredients (velveeta slices are the best i've had so far)
light coat of butter over entire area
in the meantime set one of the burners to medium (~5) and place a non-stick frying pan on it to pre-heat...pan is ready when a few drops of water will quickly evaporate off the surface
place sandwich in the pan for about 1.5 minutes on the first side and about 1 minute on the second side...done
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i'm setting the o/u on your weight at 280 lbs