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Forum: Televised Poker 11-29-2007, 09:02 PM
Replies: 23
Views: 58
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: Robert Varkonyi\'s Poker Strategy Manual

I have read it and I would like to sum it up with a few words. Basically you play poker like you have a big penis. This is so important I'll say it again. YOU PLAY POKER LIKE YOU HAVE A BIG...
Forum: Beginners Questions 11-17-2007, 11:04 AM
Replies: 26
Views: 17
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: $27 bankroll

You should buy in for your entire bankroll in a 50nl or preferably a 100 nl game. Great bankroll management starts and ends with putting your entire roll at risk as a small stack in a big game. It...
Forum: Beginners Questions 11-16-2007, 12:07 AM
Replies: 14
Views: 4
Posted By PenisCreamus
Define \"Donkey\"

I have always thought that a Donkey is a farm animal with 4 legs and an abnormally prodigious penis. Now I am told it is a "bad" poker player. That would explain why that guy on Full Tilt called me...
Forum: Beginners Questions 11-15-2007, 11:57 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 10
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: 6 handed vs full ring

I've found the big difference is that in Full Ring you have guys that are playing with money collected from their ho's. They are looking to go allin because if they lose they get more money from the...
Forum: Beginners Questions 11-15-2007, 11:49 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 4
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: UTG question

I think you need to play these hands like you are going to flop the nuts. Limp and reraise like you have aa. This will get everyone to fold and FEAR you. Even if you get called you will flop...
Forum: Beginners Questions 10-30-2007, 10:06 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 3
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: What is the point of playing cash games on Pokerstars?

YES!!! PJO you are exactly right!!!!!! ALL IN!!!! Just like Doyle!!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Forum: Beginners Questions 10-30-2007, 09:16 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 3
Posted By PenisCreamus
What is the point of playing cash games on Pokerstars?

I have been playing 100nl FR on stars for the last two weeks, and it is nut peddler central. The play is so tight it is ridiculous. You can steal small pots all day, but I would rather see Roseanne...
Forum: Beginners Questions 10-18-2007, 10:48 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 4
Posted By PenisCreamus
Did I play this hand badly?

I'm playing 9 handed 100 nl on Stars. This guy raises 5x bb and I call with 3-2 suited. I just read Super System and Brunson says he looks to get 10% of his money in with suited connectors. So I...
Forum: Televised Poker 10-18-2007, 10:37 PM
Replies: 36
Views: 20
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: Main Event-- has the sport jumped the shark??

The main event is all about who gets the luckiest, not who plays the best. Most of the contestants, especially Khan, Yang, and Humberto act like classless morons. Penis Creamus out.
Forum: Televised Poker 10-18-2007, 10:27 PM
Replies: 144
Views: 37
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: Hevad Kahn

I think his outlandish antics are a direct result of having a small penis
Forum: Beginners Questions 09-15-2007, 11:16 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 17
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: runner runner

A runner is someone who uses his or her legs to go from place to place, usually moving them very fast to do so. This is debatable with fat people, however. Seriously, it means someone is way behind...
Forum: Beginners Questions 09-15-2007, 11:11 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 3
Posted By PenisCreamus
10 10 thru AA

What do you guys do when you raise pf 3-5x bb with 10 10 JJ
QQ KK AA and get 1 to 3 callers. Flop is 9 5 2 rainbow.
You cbet 3/4 or the full pot, and you get reraises 3x your bet. I never know...
Forum: Beginners Questions 09-15-2007, 11:03 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 3
Posted By PenisCreamus
Re: hey im new here

Deposit more than you can afford into an account at an online poker site, and play the biggest game you can find. Use all of the money you deposited to buy in. Good bankroll management requires...
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