I Need Management Advice
 

I start my new supervisory job on Monday. I think I'm ready, except for the whole "knowing how to be a manager" thing.

I'm sure there's plenty of management majors in bbv, training for their jobs at Wendy's and Dollar General. What tips can you give me?

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Keep a pint of liquor on you at all times.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

A slap on the ass is a good way to show appreciation for a job well done.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

love urself

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Sexual assualt is serious biz IMO

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

just whip it out, it's obv she likes you.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Watch The Office (UK version, obv).

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
Watch The Office (UK version, obv).

[/ QUOTE ]

This is bad advice IMO

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Watch The Office (UK version, obv).

[/ QUOTE ]

This is bad advice IMO

[/ QUOTE ]

That is an awesome show and no matter the problem the answer is always watching the comedic character stylings of Ricky Gervais.

Anyone who suggests otherwise is just supporting the terrorists.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Just keep repeating....It's my way or the highway.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

make frequent use of the term "suckah suckah dick yall" in your meetings.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Dont forget the pack of dutch masters and the 1/8 of weed yo.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
What tips can you give me?

[/ QUOTE ]

1. Believe it or not, it all comes down to communication. What are your expectations? How is someone or something exceeding, meeting or not meeting your expectations? Communicate that as clearly and as simply as you can. Rinse, repeat. When something is not going the way you would like it to be going, ask yourself whether the person(s) responsible are not meeting your expectations because you have not communicated effectively. Most people, in my experience, want to do a good job and earn your praise. Help them to do that.

2. After you make a decision, put it into effect immediately. Never wait for "the right time". It never gets any righter and you are only causing yourself and probably others to suffer while you wait.

Good luck.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Whatever you do, don't ask NT! for advice on a job. He gets real uppity when people ask questions.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

What I've decided upon so far:

1. I'm going to refer to everyone as 'underlings.'

2. Hint that female employees who are...friendly...with me will get raises.

3. Send out an office-wide memo stating that there is poo-poo in my no-no.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Your job is to facilitate them in doing their job.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
make frequent use of the term "suckah suckah dick yall" in your meetings.

[/ QUOTE ]

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

lock everyone in a basement room and tell them that the only way out is by signing a contract to obey your every word and do what ever you say. after that, you can just use guerrilla tactics on whoever bothers you with your new slaves.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
Your job is to facilitate them in doing their job.

[/ QUOTE ]

Did you mean fellate?

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
What I've decided upon so far:

1. I'm going to refer to everyone as 'underlings.'

[/ QUOTE ]

Use 'commoners' once in awhile to mix it up.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
3. Send out an office-wide memo stating that there is poo-poo in my no-no.

[/ QUOTE ]

This should be the very first thing you do. No, wait, it should be the second - the first thing you should do is treat the entire office to bean burritos from Taco Bell. Anyone who doesn't eat at least six of them should be subjected to merciless razzing until they sack up.

Then take away all the toilet paper.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
Your job is to facilitate them in doing their job.

[/ QUOTE ]

Circulate a memo listing all known Facebook and MySpace sites of porn stars. This will facilitate job doing.

Be sure to double the pay of the janitorial staff.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Don't get caught up in actually "doing" stuff, your job now is to do nothing and get paid more than those who actually keep the company alive.

Oh, and everyone will hate you from this point forward, don't fight it.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Stay away from the Drama -

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]


Oh, and everyone will hate you from this point forward, don't fight it.

[/ QUOTE ]

qft

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

1. Collect underpants
2. ????
3. Profit

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Use the phrase 'leverage our synergys" as much as possible in meetings.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Are you cool? Act like peoples' friend when they do what you want and dont be their friend when they dont.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Intentionally use malapropisms like "we need to centralize our watches" and "this is somewhat disconcerning." Fire anyone who corrects you.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Hold a sensitivity workshop, which consists of handing out the following in pamphlet form:


http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d2...1740621758.jpg

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

this is an awesome thread.

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
Just keep repeating....It's my way or the highway.

[/ QUOTE ]

I prefer the saying "Balls to the walls, people!!"

T

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
I start my new supervisory job on Monday. I think I'm ready, except for the whole "knowing how to be a manager" thing.

I'm sure there's plenty of management majors in bbv, training for their jobs at Wendy's and Dollar General. What tips can you give me?

[/ QUOTE ]are you subtley dropping the hint that you are becoming a mod on monday?

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Just keep repeating....It's my way or the highway.

[/ QUOTE ]

I prefer the saying "Balls to the walls, people!!"

T

[/ QUOTE ] as a woman, what do you do in a balls to the walls situation?

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

Work (it). And work (it) HARD.

T

Re: I Need Management Advice
 

does your daughter read your posts.